


Borrowed Time

by Brotal24



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, Blood and Injury, Bottom Dean, Coming Untouched, Felching, Fluff, Gay Sex, Happy Ending, I Can't Believe I Wrote This, M/M, Season/Series 12 Spoilers, Slow Burn, Smut, Top Castiel
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-12
Updated: 2017-07-12
Packaged: 2018-11-13 06:01:58
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 5
Words: 35,036
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11178564
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Brotal24/pseuds/Brotal24
Summary: Dean had a not-so-apple-pie-life in his hometown; Lawrence, Kansas. Working as a mechanic on his Uncle Bobby’s Autoshop. His lawyer brother Sam visited him once a month. Spending brother bonding and bantering same old jokes and jibes. Nothing new peeked Dean’s interest except frisky women, booze, porn, pie, his Impala and the new neighbor that gives him the creeps. The first time the guy knocked on his door, his old wall clock that’s long dead came back to life. Things started going sideways in a flash. Dean discovered out of the ordinary on his new neighbor, Castiel.





	1. Chapter 1

 

 

 

Dean shut down his alarm clock but the sound of _Ramble on_ didn’t die down. He groaned and kicked himself mentally as he remembered his phone. Reaching blindly on the nightstand, he fiddled his phone with a grunt and closed eyes.

 

“Make sure this is important or else I’ll cut your manly mane for waking my beauty sleep—“

 

Sam’s amused voice cut off his drama, “Geez, good morning to you, too. I’ll be able to drown you in a coma induced coffee but..” He took a deep sigh, “I lost my shoe.”

 

Dean blinked and processed on his brain (currently on hibernation) with the words he heard. He blurted out a loud snort until he laughed complete with tears and a whizzing breath. He can sense Sam’s god mode bitch face on the other line. Wiping down a tear from his eyes, he cleared his throat. “Okay, so you really hit it off.”

 

“Dean.” Came a warning voice, the dangerous tone from Sam and Dean stifled his laugh again.

 

“Calm down your hooves, Sammy. Just tell me where the hell this time your date drop you off.”

 

After Sam’s rant call, a knock on the door cuts off his reverie of downing his mug of coffee with a mix of whiskey on it. He didn’t bother peeking on his window as the knock sounded furious and loud enough that the door rattled. He yanked the door hastily wearing his pissed off face of the century.

 

“Your car blocked off my driveway. Would you mind moving it so I won’t be late for my appointment?” A more pissed off, smoldering, glaring daggers man said. The man whose Dean’s worst nightmare, a new neighbor of his life.

 

Dean didn’t even know that his former neighbor sold the house not until Jo asked him about _‘the new kid on the block.’_ And the weird thing is that every night, he heard a crash or a scream from the new neighbor’s house. Maybe his new neighbor was some kind of a psycho killer.

 

He side glanced at his car past the guy’s shoulder and yup, it blocks his neighbor’s gold Lincoln Continental pimp car. He turned back his attention to the guy in front of him. And he can’t help his eyes checking the guy’s whole being. From the dark brown tousled sex hair, that rumpled, ridiculous too big for him tan trench coat, the twisted blue tie that matches those big piercing ocean dark blue eyes, down to those pink luscious, chapped full lips—

 

And he was cut off as the man turned around and walks away briskly with a mission of wrecking Dean's precious car. And Dean followed behind running for the guy walks faster than any walkathon contestant. “Hey!”

 

“I can move it out of my way—“ The man said reaching Dean’s car door handle but Dean caught his wrist fluidly.

 

“Cool down, man. It’s too early for your Britney Spears rant.” Dean said all giddy smiles but the guy narrowed his eyes dangerously at him.

 

The guy pried his hand away from Dean’s grip as he steps aside, giving Dean a room to haul his ass inside the car. Dean ‘s smile ended up a sneer as he got inside his Impala muttering _‘weird mofo had a period_ ’ as he parked the Impala away from the said weird mofo. He dared to fake a smile as the guy only glared more at him. And he’s lucky he didn’t bleed with that glare.

 

“You’re welcome. I’m Dean by the way.”  Dean unleashed his precious smile that made most of the ladies swoon as he climbed out his car. But his smile died in an instant when it didn’t affect the guy’s smoldering face.

 

“Castiel.” The guy—Castiel, (yeah, because his weird the name fits) said icily with his stoic face and monotone, rough, graveled voice. Now Dean wondered if the guy was also an android on the loose.

 

“Nice meeting you, Cas.” Dean said sarcastically before Cas ignored him and got inside his car.

 

Castiel veered his car, drive on the road, left him with its smoky trail. So, he just rolled his eyes and drop one last check over on his baby before running back inside his house. As he made his way into his room, getting his wallet and phone, he noticed the old wall clock’s hand stopped.

 

He stared at it as if it’s going to move if he stared hard and long enough his eyes turn red. And he almost squeaks upon remembering Sam. So, he once again ran back to his car but before he successfully hauled his ass inside the car, a blue-eyed lanky kid stood on his way.

 

“That thing is going to kill you.”The kid is way too serious and now threatening as he invaded Dean’s personal space.

 

Dean huffed in defeat, “Look, kiddo I’ve got a panic moose to handle and if I arrive there too late, the world is in grave danger.” He handed awkwardly the kid a few wads of dollars.

 

But the kid just looked at him like he’d said something very wrong. Well, what he said was kind of exaggerated but it wasn’t that wrong because Samantha surely plots now his plan of revenge upon settling him on random blind dates. And that random date was none other than Becky, aka Sam’s nightmare and stalker.

 

The kid’s face turned more determined as he squared his shoulders, “Your soul is fading out. And the only thing that can save you is to jump-off or you’re gonna die..here.” He steps away from Dean as someone passed by and gives Dean a nod.

 

“Hey, what’re you rambling about?” Dean crossed his arms over his chest as he stared down at the kid.

 

The kid blinked then looked down worriedly at his shoes and fiddled the edge of his dark red hooded jacket. He gave Dean one last befuddle look from his baby blue eyes before he walked away with hunched shoulders.

 

“Huh. Is it the coffee or the too much blue I saw first thing in the morning?” Dean mumbled as he got back into his car.

 

Blame the early rush hour traffic of why Dean stuck on the highway. Ten messages from Sam of _‘Where the heck are you, man?  I’m dying and I need my salad.’_ Litanies of colorful curses when he nearly crashes into the bumper’s car in front of the line. When he finally arrived at the said place, he waited twenty minutes for the moose to come out from his habitat. His calls straight away to Sam’s voicemail because the bitch was starting his revenge.

 

“I swear to Elvis, if you won’t show up I’ll leave you, Samantha. The forest will be your sanctuary until your freaking’ hair grows out freaking’ long. You’ll need a tall castle for it—“

 

A loud big explosion cut off his kind of joke threat. He looked around where the noise was. His eyes landed on a scene of commotion a few meters away from where he stood.  Three cars crashed and smashed each other, smoke appeared out of the car’s hood. Cars alarmed, blared out in dissonant noise.

 

He walked through the throngs of people around the accident area. A few minutes passed, an ambulance arrived along with the firetrucks. The medics immediately took the victims carefully out from their wrecked cars. One of the worst victims was a mother and her son. One of the medics pumped the woman’s chest, reviving her from it’s bloody, no pulse state, face unrecognizable due to damage. 

 

Dean swallowed the bile rising up his throat and he almost throws up. He backs away and took a few deep calming breaths like the shrink told him to do after dealing his depression caused by the car crash who took his parents in a flash. He’s just only four years old with 6 months Sam on his arms. Bobby, a family friend and adoptive Uncle of his, took their adoption.

 

And Dean was thankful for the life he got now. After he finished his GED, he settled working on Bobby’s Auto shop as a mechanic at day and bartender at night. He did it for years and supporting Sam’s college lawyer course until he graduated.

 

No, it wasn’t that easy at all. Especially when times like this the panic attack strikes back that he can’t handle without passing out. The booze is one of those things that can dull the twisted pain inside slowly killing him. He hides it from his family and friends up until now.

 

The vibrated buzz on the back of his pocket jeans pulled him back down to earth. Fiddling with shaking fingers on his phone, he answered Sam’s call.

 

_“Dean, are you okay?”_ Of course, Sam heard his hallowed breath on the other line.

 

He ran a hand through his hair as he caught the kid who ran on him earlier standing among the by watchers. “Yeah, I’m good. Don’t stress your mane.”

 

_“Hey, I’ll be the one telling you that.”_

 

Dean cleared his throat, changing the subject, “So, you finally came back from Mars. How’s E.T. phone home?”

 

Sam just only sigh and probably rolled his eyes, _“ I’m waiting here in the car.”_

 

“Oh. Uhm, good now just wait for more.” He heard Sam’s protest before he hangs up and looked around. But he lost the kid in his sight. A voice behind him caught his attention. He turned around only to find no one behind him.

 

_“Jump off, Dean.”_

 

Dean huffed and turned around once again, expecting Sam's giant form and smug face. But again, nobody is standing behind him.  “Yup, I should probably put more whiskey next time—“ His eyes widened as he caught a glimpse of a hooded shadow stood beside the now dead victim. “..or not.”

 

He blinked many times and rubbed his eyes, but the pitch black shadow slowly turned its head to him. Dean’s hair on his nape stood as those obscured red two eyes under the hood glowed and simply glared at him. Even though he can’t quite clearly see the face of it, those eyes were enough evidence that the thing was glaring at him.

 

Dean’s breath now more shallow and he stepped back. But he yelped (a manly yelp) when he bumped onto something..or someone tall as his brother.

 

“Ouchy, Dean.” Sam hissed when Dean smacked him a thwack on his head.

 

“That’s for creeping me out—Ouch!” Dean achieved back a hard flip from Sam.

 

“And that’s for setting me up on a disastrous blind date! Really, Dean?! Of all the revenge you pulled is Becky?! Why, Dean?! Is that how you really hate me?! And I hate you back for that. You know what, never mind.” Sam stomped away and Dean jogged because his brother has its long limbs who only took five strides where the car parked.

 

He glanced back one last time on the accident. The shadow was gone but the feeling of someone’s watching him lingered. Or maybe the coffee and that Castiel’s sour mood kicked in so hard that made him hallucinate things. He got inside the car before Sam’s bitchface mix in.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Of course, Sam’s bitchface mixed in as Dean laughed at his mess. Sam told him the mess of a date he’d been through as the waiter keeps on messing every time Becky made a move (sneaked her foot towards his groin). Well, at the end the waiter was the ex-girlfriend of Becky. So, Sam ended up talking to the manager of the restaurant instead.

 

“What happened to your lost shoe?” Dean asked too obvious stifling his laugh as he parked the car in front of Bobby’s Auto shop.

 

Sam cleared his throat and ran his huge hand through  his long shiny smooth hair (in slow motion like a shampoo commercial model) “I..uhh..” He blushed and Dean turned to him raising his eyebrows suspiciously. “Things got fuzzy..and..”

 

Dean whistles and punched his brother’s arm, “Way to go, Sasquatch. I’m glad it didn’t end up tapping Becky’s ass. I’m not sorry by the way.”  

 

Sam glared at him as he got out of the car and Sam followed suit. Until they got inside the shop Sam’s still blushing like a high school girl nerd with pigtails and angst. But before he pushed on that matter, Bobby greeted them with his gruff scowl™. Well, the scowl was for Dean for being 30 minutes late.

 

“Sorry, Bobby it’s my fault—“ Sam’s being a saint mode been cut off by a someone cruel.

 

Dean who rolled his eyes at his brother’s too precious begging puppy eyes and destroyed his dignity. “He lost his shoe.”

 

Bobby stared at Sam hard enough for the Sasquatch to cringe. “Boy, I don’t wanna know.”

 

And that’s the cue to start their day. Sam headed straight to catch some shuteye and crashed on Bobby’s old squeaky couch that smelt different kinds of alcohol. While Dean does his work on the silver Prius, upgrading everything.

 

The owner keeps on bitching about the car’s engine and It's just the second time the car experienced a tune-up. After dealing with it, Ash and Kevin declared lunch with Dean in tow. They landed on a diner that made glorious pies and Dean salivating chosen variety of different pies.

 

Devouring every creamy, crunchy piece. He didn’t forget the take-out salad and other rabbit side dish for his moose of a brother still passed out on Bobby’s couch. How the hell he even sleep with the smell? Sam’s on vacation and within the next three days, he will fly back to Florida to face his ass kicker clients.

 

His brother had an apple pie life along with his longtime dog named Jess.  That he would always check every god damn hour where he left it to Charlie: a dog lover and Queen of Moondoor. Dean was thankful Sam tried spending his time with him even though finding a free time being a lawyer was considered a miracle.

 

So, they’re going to spend the last three days with booze, women and getting laid. And he’s 101% sure Sam will say a big yes because he's the big brother damn it. And it’s on the rule of big brothers pestering their younger brothers. Dean’s big brother rulebook specifically.

 

They walked back to Bobby’s shop bantering about aliens, on how to kill using a piece of pencil, how to use socks in times of trouble with no toilet paper around. Dean grimaced with disgust on the last one and left them. His throat dry and the urge of drinking whiskey at work is a no-no. Especially in Sam’s unconscious presence.

 

While standing in front of an old, cranky vending machine, patiently waiting for the last can of Coke to come out, and he got no other choice because he’s kind of lazy finding another, staring at how slowly it moved, he can’t help thinking about what happened a few hours ago. The gory accident and that hooded black shadow lurking with those glowing red eyes. Dean kicked the vending machine hard enough until the precious can of coke came out.

 

He picked it up grudgingly and opened it with a fizzing sound. He took a sip and ignored how bad it tastes. His mind drifted out again, “Damn, I felt like I’m in a shitty suspense horror movie.”

 

The deafening silence inside the convenient store made all the hair on his body stood. He glanced back at the counter where the cashier watched a video on his phone. Dean took a few calming breaths. The itchy feeling of two eyes watching him is back, now on its intense creepy level.

 

His heart hammered inside his rib cage as the light flickered above his head. He shut his eyes tight, tightened his grip on the can coke he’s holding. Counting down slowly, he opened his eyes with gritted teeth and he winced upon the light. He now stood in a different place.

 

“Fuck!” He stumbled back, eyes widened in horror, coke can no longer on his hand. “How the fuck did this happened?”

 

He found himself stood in the middle of a dark forest. The ground wet and muddy with its clay brown soil. Dried dead leaves covered above it. The twisted branches on each huge dead trees were like bony wicked fingers moving swiftly along the chilly gust of wind.

 

_“Jump.”_ A voice whispered from nowhere echoed.

 

Dean scrambled back, panic and fear rising inside his gut. His eyes darted everywhere finding a way out. The whispers got louder inside the forest and he can’t move his legs as he tried to run. The mud swallowing his feet.

 

When he turned around, the shadow watched him, floating like a dead leaf. Torn edge of its dark hood like octopus trailing on it’s back. Willow- bony hands extended and reached him. He struggled and doubled his efforts strain his legs.

 

The shadow hovered close to him now. Dean poured all of his strength along with the adrenaline and pulled his legs out from the muddy swamp.  As long as his feet moved and no longer stuck, he bolted running as fast as he can, never looking back. He could hear the whispers following him.

 

_“Jump off!”_

 

Dean halted, panting, hands on his knees. He turned around and the shadow’s hands stretch towards him. Below the cliff is endless darkness. He shut his eyes, stood rigidly and let his body fall. The empty darkness swallowed him.

 

“Dean!”

 

Dean sucked in his breath, eyes widened, panting, and Sam’s worried face came into his blurry view.

 

“You okay?” Sam asked, holding Dean’s shoulder.

 

Dean blinked his eyes and calmed his breath. It was just a dream, no, a fucking nightmare but it felt too real. “I..uhh..just peachy.”

 

“You fainted, man.” Sam fix him with a glare and a pissed tone on his voice.

 

Dean’s eyes gone unfocused as he checked the surrounding. He’s inside their house, “I need a drink.”

 

He stood up and surprised when he stumbled down. Sam caught him though. His legs felt sore and tired like he’d run a 5k marathon the whole day.

 

Sam shot him a half concern glare, “Please, tell me what’s going on. You won’t like the way I crack that out.” Now his bitch face leveled up to god mode.

 

Dean took a deep breath, glanced at his brother’s somber face then at the old wall clock which is oddly working on now, then back at Sam’s now annoyed face, crossing his arms over his chest. “You won’t believe it—“

 

“Have you met me?” Sam deadpanned and blew his fringe and sat on the coffee table, facing Dean.

 

Dean worried his bottom lip, “I saw this..thing..” He licked his lips, clenched his fist tight as Sam stared at him tersely. “Like hours ago from the accident site. This creepy shadow showed up with red glowing eyes. Then I heard..” He swallowed, “..voices..then this weird dreams—“ He stood up hastily, “You know what, I’m just tired and my mind playing tricks on me.” He plastered a fake smile but yeah Sammy always knew.

 

Sam stood up slowly and patted his shoulder, lip tight into a thin line. Right. His one and only brother think he’s just different kinds of crazy now. Great.

 

“Now what did I told ya..” Dean shrugged, hands in his pockets.

 

“Dean, I want you to know—“

 

“Nah, it’s okay, Sam. Really, I didn’t believe it either so, let’s just drop this..” He avoided Sam’s apologetic face. “So, what’s your plan for the next final days?”  He once again plastered the best fake grin.

 

Sam though stared and tried not pushing on the subject and the next step of touchy feelings talk that Dean avoided at all times. So, he took a deep sigh, shoulders slumped back to its usual nonchalant poise. “Well, since Bobby threatened me not  to see your face for a week after you fainted, then the Roadhouse at Ellen's will be the next stop.”

 

Dean opened his mouth then snapped it close. He opens his mouth again but Sam already beats him.

 

“And that means, you should rest..here.”

 

Dean rolled his eyes, “ Don’t you too baby me, Sam—“

 

Sam cut him with a snort, “Yeah, try Ellen’s wrath first let’s see how far your stubborn-ass will stand.”

 

And Dean considered this and defeatedly pouted then shuddered as he remembered those days when he’s being crushed by Ellen’s wrath, threatening him on frying his nuts on the plate and let him eat it when he fainted too after not getting rest working his ass off 24/7 for one week. Good thing they didn’t admit him to the hospital. Damn, why was he always a fan of fainting?  

 

“Okay, so off you go and make sure to knock first if you don’t want to spend your brain bleaching for the rest of your life with the images of me, stark naked with three—“

 

Sam grimaced and smack Dean’s face with a pillow, “Gross, Dean! Make sure to put a sock on the door! Or else I will pee on the Impala’s seat!”

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Dean spent his night on the couch, legs propped up on the coffee table with littered beer bottles and a box of pizza on it. Flicking channels on his too flat screen TV until he settles on re-runs of Dr. Sexy M.D. The creepy, strange feeling faded out by the buzz effect of the beer.

 

But it only lasts an hour and it creeps back in full force. The wall clock’s ticking noise keeps Dean twitched nervously on his seat.  So, he turned the volume up enough for his neighbors (especially that weird Casti-eel) his thoughts and the clock’s noise drowned.

 

Three more beers and a half bottle of whiskey later, glancing at the wall clock, he realized too late that it’s 2:15 in the morning. And yeah, he remembered Sam and discovered his brother wasn’t in his room yet. But the worry fades as he fished out his phone on the coffee table.

 

Sam dropped a text that he’ll spend the night in Ellen’s hair. Heh. Avoiding his early warning then.

 

Grinning, he texts back, “Don’t lose your shoe this time, bitch.” He laughed evilly and crashed back down on the couch and shut his eyes. But before sleep took away his consciousness his phone buzzed.

 

_“Just so you know, I had another reserved pair namely: Your boots, jerk.”_

 

Dean sat up abruptly and typed with such determination, “Don’t you ever lose that one. Your hair is in great danger now Samantha!”

 

And Sam only replied back an emoticon with tongue sticking out.

 

“Fudge you.” Dean’s stomach grumbles, he felt the acid burning his insides since he didn’t even bother eating a decent food lately.

 

He grudgingly goes to the fridge but his attention caught up as he heard a rumbling car engine outside. Peering at the window, he saw Sam’s giant form. His brother’s face was serious, brows furrowed in deep concentration as he stared at something—Dean followed Sam’s gaze and surprisingly aware of the familiar black sleek car in front of Castiel's driveway. Again.

 

“What the hell. How did it get there?!” Dean’s slightly sleepy and tipsy state long gone.

 

He’s 105% sure and remembered that he parked the Impala in Bobby’ garage before his faint drama happened. And lastly, he got the keys safely stored inside the fishbowl on the coffee table. Earning him a near squeak as the wall clock suddenly alarmed loudly, he gets the keys and ran outside.

 

He made a beeline and jogged towards Sam’s confused face.

 

“Dean, how did it got here?” Sam checked and peered at the car’s passenger window as he held the handle. “It’s locked.” Stating the obvious he turned to Dean. “Or somebody hard-wired it.”

 

“No, shit Sherlock.” Dean deadpanned, “The hell I know too as long as she’s safe...” He swallowed and pushed down the panic and fear slowly rising. He jiggled the keys and unlocked the Impala but he didn’t miss Sam still deep in thought beside him.

 

“I’m not drunk, Dean. I checked her in Bobby’s garage before I headed back here.” Sam said airily.

 

Instead of answering, he opened the door and got inside the car. He turned on the engine as Sam hurriedly got inside the car. Neither one of them talks because It’ll only worsen the creepy situation. So, they just silently drowned their selves in their own thoughts.

 

But it wasn’t long enough as both of them flinched when a dark human figure slammed on the windshield. Sam cringed back, flailing his long limbs wildly like a drowning moose. Dean’s adrenaline took in and jammed the pedal hard but the car never moved. 

 

And now the dark figure’s face came into clear view as it leaned closer to the windshield, knocking the glass furiously. And Holy guacamole, it’s the weird kid, face contorted in fear, blue eyes wide, mouth shouting something they can’t decipher to hear.

 

Fortunately, Sam cuts Dean’s panic, “Dean, stop!” He got out of the car and Dean followed suit with hesitant steps.

 

Dean narrowed his eyes as he remembered the familiar face of the kid, answering Sam’s 101 questions.

 

“Samandriel but I preferred the name, Alfie.” Said the kid—Alfie, round blue eyes stared at Dean. He moved a few inches away from the car, fingers fiddled the hem of his hooded jacket.

 

“Hey, uhm.. are you lost or—“ Sam’s gentle voice cuts off by Dean.

 

“What the hell’s wrong with you, Alfie?!” Dean didn’t mean to snap, raised his voice and ignored Sam’s glare.

 

Alfie didn’t take Dean’s anger and stepped closer to him, grabbed his wrist with cold nimble fingers. “You should run away from here! I told you that this thing will kill you any chance! You should run now!” He shouted as he let go of Dean’s wrist only to clutch his hand on his chest.

 

Now both Dean and Sam way up confused about what Alfie’s babbling about. But Sam chooses his inner instincts and dialed 911 on his phone as Alfie shivered and sank to the ground. Dean chooses his instinct too as he ran and hovered worriedly beside Alfie.

 

And for a moment, Dean’s interested in those words. He just felt it and it’s strong he can’t ignore. He held Alfie’s shoulder and slowly turned him, lay his back flat on the ground, head propped down on his lap. Alfie stared up at him and he caught pain flashed through those eyes.

 

“What do you mean? Please, tell me..” Dean asked, voice tight yet laced with hidden fear.

 

Alfie grabbed his arm and pulled himself up, “Save yourself. Jump off, now. Please.” He stood up, pushed Dean away from him. Inside his jacket, he pulled out a gun and aimed it at Dean.

 

Dean slowly backed away from Alfie, eyeing nervously on the gun aimed at him. “Whoah..hey, Alfie calm down, kid. We can talk this—“

 

“Just run!” Alfie bellowed and pulled the trigger.

 

Dean bolted, ran away and dodge the bullets. In his peripheral vision, past Alfie’s shoulder, he caught Sam running towards Alfie. A plan for tackling the _kid-on-the loose_ down. Alfie didn’t stop shooting and missing his aim.

 

He only caught a blared flash of light towards Alfie before the kid whipped by a ten-wheeler truck. The truck skidded dangerously towards him but it tilted on the side and hit on the nearest lam-post. The impact made the post fell and crushed a few meters away from the Impala.

 

Dean noticed a spark on the broken wire dangled on the lamp post.The truck skidded, sharp noise from friction against the asphalt rang and echoed. Until it halted with a hiss and the gas leaked captured the spark on the broken wires. It flicked twice and ignite a fire.

 

Dean caught Sam’s arm and dragged him away from the truck. As they turned their backs it exploded, licking hot fire chased their backs. It only took them two steps away as the truck exploded again. Shards of broken truck pieces covered with fire flew above their heads.

 

They nearly hit by a burning door flying pass above their heads as they crouched down the ground. He felt Sam flinched as they crawled away from the licking fire running towards them. And it’ll be too late if they crawled slowly like a snail.

 

Despite the ringing in his ears, Dean hauled his ass up with Sam in tow limping as they ran successfully away from the marvelous fire. They stopped under the shed and watched the damage in front of them. Sam still panting, hands on his knees, hair covered his face as he stared down at the ground.

 

While Dean’s attention caught up with his memories he longer buried deep as he stared wide eyes into the fire. He tasted copper as he licked his chapped lips. The left side of his temple stung as he wiped it with his hand.

 

Blood smeared on his palm. Yep, it’s just a gash tearing the skin on his temple. He snapped his attention back to Sam who groaned in pain beside him.

 

“Fuck!” Dean’s eyes widened when his brother fell down his knees. He caught Sam’s arm and hauled him to stand. “Did something hit you?” He eyed Sam’s torn, smeared with blood jeans.

 

With a contorted pain face, Sam replied, “ I fell and hit my knee hard. I can’t feel it..”

 

Dean tightened his hold on Sam’s arm and slung it over his shoulder to support his weight. Shit. “Just hold on, Sammy.” He fumbled his pockets then cursed and kick himself because he remembered too late he forgot his phone. Double shit. “Give me your phone.”

 

“Don’t bother, I already called 911 and they're on their way I guess.” Sam assured and whimpered trying to move his wounded leg. Being a big brother, Dean slapped Sam’s arm.

 

“Just stop moving.” He used his stern big brother voice but put a reassuring squeeze on Sam’s shoulder.

 

Before Sam can retort back, they heard the ambulance’s siren heading where they stood. Dean noticed few of their neighbors emerged from their houses and watched the huge fire swallowing the truck. One of them was Jody and he caught Dean’s eyes. Her eyes widened in horror watching the fire then back to them.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Officer Jody Mills put her phone back in the pocket of her uniform and took a defeated sigh. Dean shot her a concerned look as he paced beside the aligned blue chairs in the waiting area of the hospital.

 

“I called the brother of the victim and he’s on his way.” Jody slumped down one of the chairs with a weary face.

 

Dean just nodded, bit the inside of his cheek and took his seat beside Jody. He leaned down, elbows rested on his thighs, hands clasped, thumb caressing his stubble chin.

 

“If you can just tell me what the fuck happened, Dean...” Jody turned to Dean, crossed arms on her chest and watched him warily.

 

Dean leaned back, posture turned rigid as the accident flashed behind his eyes. “I told you already—“

 

“No, I want to know your side of the story.” Jody’s glaring eyes glued him to his seat.

 

Dean looked down, “It just—“ He inhaled sharply, counting down and thrust aside nausea.  “It happened too fast..”

 

Jody held his shoulder, “Okay, I won’t push it this time, Dean.” She trailed her eyes from Dean’s haggard face before she stood, thumbs hooked on the belt loop. “You look like shit. Coffee?”

 

Dean’s eyes twinkled and his fuzzy brain cleared for a short moment . Especially now his empty stomach grumbled. “Oh, please.” He rubbed his eyes with the back of his hand.

 

Jody walked down the hallway and disappeared as she turned on the left corner. Dean leaned back and noticed the stain of blood caked on his palms. He let the anxiousness flow through his system and overwhelmed his thoughts.

 

“Why is this happening?..” He asked staring at his palms like it will talk and give him answers. But it’s not Google and yeah, accidents don’t just happen accidentally.

 

If he spill of what happened to him lately, started from yesterday, Jody will drown him in a tank of coffee, send him to some shrinks, again—Hell, even Sam didn’t believe him in the first place. Where did even that truck come from?

 

The police expected a burning body inside the truck but didn’t trace any. He shut his eyes tight. Drowned the noise of soft murmurs as the nurses and doctors passed by. When he opened his eyes, he caught a pair of piercing ocean deep blues.

 

He stood up hastily as his gaze followed Castiel’s back, walking briskly, tan trench-coat flapped behind him. Dean’s attention cuts off as Jody passed him a cup of coffee. He took it with a grin.

 

“Now I’m alive.” Dean took a sip as he scanned the hallway with his eyes but Castiel was out of his sight.

 

Jody flopped back down on the chair, “Is the doctor coming out yet?”

 

Dean shook his head and continued sipping the coffee solemnly.

 

“You should catch some shuteye, Dean—“

 

“No, not yet since my brother’s inside the O.R flopping his hair gloriously—“

 

“C’mon, Dean you’re gonna collapse any minute now.”Jody patted his shoulder again. “I’ll stay here and call you if the doctors emerge from that holy door.” She grinned and Dean heaved a defeated sigh, stood up and hesitantly left.

 

Instead of going home, Dean spends his waking hour moments inside the convenient store. He doesn’t care when the cashier shoots him knowing looks. Upon noticing his reflection on the glass doors, bondage plastered on his forehead, the bloodstain on his flannel shirt, hair disheveled complete with bloodshot eyes, well that explained the knowing looks he got. He shrugged and goes on the aisle where the beers put in a fridge.

 

But he stopped in front of it, hands hovered hesitantly on the handle. This situation happened to him yesterday. He glanced back at the cashier reading a skin mag, shooting him back with a disdainful look this time. Right.

 

He straightened and brace himself for the upcoming weirdness going to happen. The light didn’t flicker, the cashier still on his seat, flipping the mag. But among the buzzing noise, he heard a sharp screeching sound coming from afar. He stepped back, ears perked up, heart hammering inside his chest, fist clenched tight on his side, eyes darted everywhere as the noise got louder.

 

Dean turned to the cashier, opened his mouth but his voice won’t come out. He staggered back, felt his back hit the fridge as the noise destroying his eardrums. He can’t even move his hands to cover his bleeding ears. What’s happening?....

 

Is this some kind of a heart attack thing? Is this the effect of eating burgers and too much grease half of his life? Crap. Maybe he needs to see a shrink back.

 

His vision became hazy, surroundings swirled that made his head throbbed. The jolt of pain made him sank to his knees and groaned. However, beyond his agony, he’s aware of footsteps coming close behind him. 

 

He held his breath expecting the shadow to smite him. But he felt a warm hand on his shoulder, pushed him back gently into a sitting position. Damn, he didn’t notice how he ended down hugging the floor. He met a pair of deep blue eyes.

 

“Cas?..” He exhaled in relief, croaked out weakly and blinking back the tears on the rim of his eyes.

 

He felt two calloused warm hands held his face. “Dean!” Cas gently shook Dean’s face who tried to focus his eyes. “Hey, I got you. It’s okay.” Cas’ reassuring rough, gravel voice was so distant.

 

Dean wants to crack Cas a joke but the resonating noise amplified. He clenched his teeth as the sharp pain dug into his head. The burning pain scattered on his chest. He shut his eyes tight once again.

 

_Falling leaves._

 

Blink.

 

_Black feathers falling down._

 

Blink.

 

_Dark evening sky and Sam in his arms. They both flinched as the river beside them made an explosion noise. Something’s fell and crash into the river. He looked up to the dark sky with glowing lights like meteors._

 

_“Angels... They’re falling..”_

 

Blink.

 

_Sparks of light. The door of the barn open and came in a man. Bobby stood beside him shooting the man._

 

Blink.

 

_Wings. A crackling sound of thunder. Shadow of glorious wings appeared. Deep blue eyes._

 

Blink.

 

_“Who are you?”_

 

_The man turned to him but the darkness snatched everything as the pain drowned him._

Dean woke up with a gasp and Castiel’s worry face greeted him. He blinked once more focusing on Castiel’s face. “Blue eyes...” He mumbled, throat hoarse and dry like he swallowed a mouthful of sand mixed with gravel.

 

Dean swallowed back a hitched breath as Castiel’s face mere inch close to his face. Castiel stared at him and when he opened his luscious pink cotton candy lips, Dean caught a whiff of mint and vanilla. He licked his lips and internally tackled his urge to kiss those lips.

 

He looked back to Cas’ eyes and caught himself mesmerize as they held gazes.

 

Cas’ lips opened  and uttered, “Dean..”

 

But Jody chooses the moment to cut in their moment as she entered the room. They moved away from each other. Dean lied down stiffly while Cas stood in the corner near the window.

 

“What did I just said?” She rested a hand on her hip, raised her left eyebrow that reminds Dean of Ellen. “Now look at you. What happened, Dean?” Her voice stern and made Dean cringed on his bed.

 

Dean opened his mouth and fuck how on earth did his throat go dry as a Sahara. Fortunately, Castiel answered for him.

 

“He fainted. I saw him at the nearest convenient store.” Cas said simply and stoically.

 

Jody turned his attention to Cas, eyes widened like she only noticed the guy just now. Then she shook her head in disappointment at Dean. “Thank you for carrying this asshole back here.”

 

What?! Dean alarmed but too weak to clarify things up. Jody glared daggers at him so he slumped back down in defeat. He imagined his self, carried bridal style on Cas’ arms and squashed it down.

 

“Officer Jody Mills, by the way.” She extended her hand to Cas.

 

Castiel the weirdo that he is, started at Jody’s hand before he shook it awkwardly. “Castiel Novak.”

 

Jody’s eyes widened again. Their handshake slowly came to a halt and she let go. Dean watched them curiously. “You mean..the brother of Alfie?” She asked hesitantly.

 

Castiel straightened his posture, “He preferred that name but he was born with the name Samandriel.” He uttered and Dean nearly choked on his own saliva. “I’m his older brother.”

 

Jody turned to Dean slowly and shoot him a _‘shut-your-pie-hole’_ glare. But it’s too late for him to realize how an asshole he is. Cas’ brother died because of them, specifically because of Dean. Dean noticed Cas’ clenched fist on his sides, eyes glared at him.

 

“I want to punch you right now.” Cas said, voice miraculously calm. “But it’s useless..it won’t bring my only family back to life.”

 

Fuck his life. Dean sagged as he noticed the rim of Cas’ eyes turned red, tears ready to fall. Cas’ lips trembled a little bit and as he took a deep breath.

 

Just like him, Cas had only one brother left and what happened to Alfie was just like taking that last hope away from him. Dean pleaded guilty.

 

“I’m sorry—“ Dean blurted out, weak.

 

“No, Just—“  Cas inhaled sharply, “Just stop it, okay?! Cas said through gritted teeth, voice raised in anger and Dean cringed and looked down. “I don’t even know why he even saved you.” He said icily and it hurt Dean a tad bit.

 

This time, Dean looked up and held Cas’ eyes full of sorrow and anguish. He stepped back, glanced at Jody apologetically and strode away.

 

Jody shook her head. “This is not good.”

 

Dean drowned out by his thoughts of what he had done. Alfie’s life was in his hands—

 

“No, Dean just don’t blame yourself for this sudden turn of events.” Jody said reassuringly in her motherly voice. “None of it was your fault. Everything happens for a reason.” She smiled then grimaced, “That line doesn’t fit. Now go back to your Lala land.” She patted Dean’s back and left the room.

 

Dean looked at the window then back at his hands. “Fuck.”

 

He hastily peeled the sheets away, touched his foot on the floor. The tugging pain on his chest slowly escalated into his arms. But he clenched his teeth, brace his self and shut down the pain with few deep breaths. He finally stood up agonizingly slow, clutched his chest.

 

Before he successfully reached the door, he caught an orange colored sling bag on the chair near the window. He fished it with trembling hands and yanked it open.Tarot cards, a phone and a sketchbook the contents inside the bag.

 

He picked up the sketchbook and flipped it open. Tracing the different drawings, he stopped on a sketch of feathers. Falling black feathers. He flipped on the next page.

 

A sketch of the forest he dreamed lately. Flip. Different kinds of runes and some weird alphabets he didn’t recognize. He traced it with his fingers slowly.

 

There’s somewhat familiar with every written alphabet on the pad but he can’t quite remember. He flipped back to the falling feathers and noticed the tiny letters scribbled on the edge of the paper.

 

_Castiel._

 

Then it hit him. Accidents don’t happen accidentally. Because this ain't count as one. “I need..to clarify things up. And a drink...a hard one.”

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Dean left the room and trudge on the hallway only to be confronted by Sam’s doctor. He plastered his precious smile. “How’s my brother, Doc?”

 

Dr. Pamela (a family friend) cast him a pointed stare and opened the clipboard she was holding. “Well, Dean your adorable brother is a-okay now. He can deal with his broken leg for a few weeks.” She closed the clipboard with a snap and beamed to Dean. “Go, see him now.”

 

Dean walked as fast as he can to Sam’s room. He yanked the door slowly and get himself inside silently. Sam was peacefully sleeping with his right leg covered in a cast.

 

He can’t help thinking about Cas, the loss he suffered right now. Taking a deep breath, he poked Sam’s nose but didn’t stir. So, he flicked it and finally, Sam flinched, jolted in panic and nearly punch Dean in the face.

 

Dean grinned, “Sorry to interrupt your beauty sleep. You okay?”

 

Sam rolled his eyes and slumped back down on the bed. “I hate you.”

 

“Alfie’s dead.”

 

Sam raised his eyebrows, “Who?”

 

“The kid Alfie who crashed by the haunted truck.” Dean watched Sam sagged, “Cas’ little brother.” Now Sam’s brow furrowed, “The weirdo neighbor, Castiel who—“

 

“The one you hate?”

 

“No—Yes!—I mean, sure the guy’s an asshole but he's just weird. You know we have our own perks and...Yeah. ” Dean fidgets and why the hell he defended the guy? Because he felt 50 shades of guilt right now.

 

Sam stared at him long enough to make him fudging blush, “Oh my God...” His hazel eyes widened.

 

Dean heard the warning inside his head blared, “No—not like that!”

 

“You liked him—“

 

“No—Yes! But not that like—kinda like—“ Why the fudge did he stuttered?!

 

“Wait, so Alfie’s his brother?” Dean kind of a bit lost upon Sam’s _changing-the-topic-techniques_ but nodded. Sam shoots him an apologetic look. “How can I help?”

 

Dean sighed and slumped down on the edge of the bed, “He’s angry, man. I can’t blame him. Alfie’s his only family but because of what happened..” His throat tightened as he remembered the anguish and pain in Cas’ eyes, staring at him full of questions.

 

“Dean..”

 

“I need to see him.”

 

 

 

 


	2. Chapter 2

 

Dean clenched his hands for the umpteenth time standing in front of Cas’ doorstep 15 minutes earlier. Licked his dry chapped lip, raised his hand, huffed, stop and withdraw his hands away from the door.  Fifty possible scenarios played inside his head of things Cas will do if he saw Dean’s pretty face.

 

Cas’ Lincoln parked in the garage, so there’s that. The guy is still moping and mourned his brother’s death. Dean observed the gloomy feels around the house.

 

The boring beige colored paint,  knee –high weeds at the backyard covering dried dead flowers. The whole place is creepy with that rusted swing near the dead flowers. The squeaky noise it made as the wind blows sends chills down his spine.

 

Dean adjusted his shirt and glanced at his wrist watch. But before he could grumble that his watch is not working, the door swung open. He froze on his spot as Cas gives him the usual icy glare. He smiled stiffly and avoided his eyes on Cas’ jeans hung low on his waist.

 

Cas took a long deep sigh, ran his hand through his messy hair. “What’re you doing here?” He leaned on the door frame, arms crossed and face wearily. The edge of his black t-shirt rises up that made Dean peeked at his sharp hipbones.

 

Dean cleared his throat and tried to remember the phrases he practiced 15 minutes earlier. But Cas’ gaze made him stuttered, “Condolence..” He kicked himself mentally in the groin and shove the orange sling bag to Cas.

 

Cas took it, lips pursed. “Thank you.” He said without looking Dean in the eyes. He instead inspects the bag and Dean still stood on his spot waiting for a pin to drop between the silence.

 

Finally, Cas looked up back to Dean, eyes round and innocent. While his hands busy flipping the sketchbook. “What? You waiting for something?”

 

Dean braced himself and squaring his shoulder, “What is this strange creature stalking up on me?” Cas stopped as he stared more on Dean, “I mean, that thing’s after my head. Alfie warned me before he—“ He bit his lip and looked away from Cas.

 

“Memetim.” With that Dean looked back to Cas with furrowed brows, “ I-I don’t know. Samandriel’s the one who knows more about it.” Cas pushes the door close but Dean stepped in and shoved himself inside. Cas took a step back when their chest bumped.

 

“Sorry.” Muttered Dean eyeing the house for a moment before returning to Cas’ alarmed face. “Wait, just please listen to me. I need to know what’s this—“ He twirl his finger in the air, “Memes—“

 

“Memetim.” Corrected Cas standing still on his spot. “They’re like..reapers.. collecting and protecting souls.”

 

“Why do I keep seeing it?”

 

“Maybe your end is near the corner.” Cas said sarcastically clutching the bag to his chest.

 

Dean analyzed the words but didn’t get out any sense of it. He chuckled that made Cas took a step back further away from him. “Alfie saved me from my death. Is this some kind of final destination stuff?” Cas slowly shook his head. “Cas, please tell me. I know you knew—“ He eyed the sketchbook and pried it away from Cas grip.

 

He opened it on the page where black feathers falling. “I dreamed of this. The moment you stood on my doorstep my fucking wall clock blared back to life. And now—“ He took off his watch and show it to Cas. “Surprise!”

 

Cas looked away and walked on the _gray-old-out-of-this-world-creepy-couch_. There’s no TV  plastered on one of the four sides of the creamed colored empty wall. Dean's not surprised.

 

“I don’t know, Dean.” Cas’ voice is tired. “Only Samandriel knew.” He sat down, clasped his hands, elbows rested on his knee. “He’s the one decided to move in here because he keeps on seeing you in his dreams begging for help.”

 

Dean sat on the opposite end of the couch, “So, what’s he? A psychic or something with that glowing crystal ball?”

 

Cas deadpanned, “Sort of.” He plucks the sketchbook away from Dean. “What’s inside are the things on his dreams.” He stopped on the page of falling feathers, “Except this one.”

 

“Huh. It’s yours.”Dean said sarcastically. “So there’s that. You’ve got the _abracadabra-see-my-future-power-thing_  like Alfie.”

 

Cas’ jaw clenched, a pissed off eyebrow lifted that made him look dominant. A hot dominant for Dean who squirmed on his seat. “Why not accept your fate instead of running away a thing you can’t escape in the end?” He stood up.

 

“No, please..” Dean didn’t care to beg with this guy. Hell, it’s death and he’s afraid. But the asshole ignored him. So he stood up and caught Cas’ wrist. Again.

 

_The moment his hand enveloped Cas’ wrist, the surroundings shifted in a blink of an eye. He saw a car, lying upside down on the asphalt. Crumbs of glass from the broken window scattered all around. Dean saw himself inside the car drenched in blood, neck twisted on the wrong side._

 

Dean felt Cas pulled back his wrist away and he came back to reality. He blinked many times and met Cas’ worried face. Damn, he’s sweating bullets, hands clammy and chest hammered inside his chest.

 

“Are you okay?”

 

Dean swallowed, “Yeah. I saw myself dead on a car crash.” He added drily.

 

But Cas held his gaze and he can’t escape nor disappear.  “I-I saw it too when you hold me.”

 

Dean staggered back on his steps and Cas hesitantly hovered his hands to Dean’s arm but didn’t make contact. “Awesome.” He ran his hand through his hair and goes to the door. “Thanks for spilling the future.”

 

What he saw made him dizzy and what he knows almost made him crazy. He stumbled a bit on the doorstep, holding the stair railing to balance himself. He heard a creepy creak noise behind as the door opened. He turned back and Cas held his shoulder.

 

Warm like water flows through his entire body. Nausea and the pull of gravity crushing him gone. Even the crick on his back he’d been suffering for years vanished without a trace. He stared wide eyes at Cas.

 

“Don’t drive.” Cas’ said sternly. “I’ll drive you back to the hospital.”

 

Dean fucking nearly whines in protest as Cas took a step back away from him. “What, you’re helping me now?”

 

Cas walked towards the hideous garage Dean had ever seen. “I have nothing to lose now.”

 

 

 

 

 

Sure, Dean’s conscience was seated beside him and mimicked Cas’ words like a broken record. Cas drives like a granny in tights, hitting the slowest speed Dean had ever ride in his life. The silence between them is awkward, way too awkward that he flinched on Cas’ voice breaking his reverie.

 

“Stop it.” Cas said sternly, eyes glared daggers on the road. His knuckles turned white gripping the steering wheel.

 

Dean looked at him with furrowed brows, “Stop what?” He snapped back.

 

“You’re thinking too loud.” Cas spared him a quick glance, eyes roamed all over his face then back at the road. “It’s not your fault. Everything’s happened for a reason...just like they always said.” The car halted as the red light blinked on the traffic lights. He glanced back at Dean and stay just like that.

 

Dean cleared his throat and fidgeted on his seat. “And you’re reading inside my head—“ Cas leaned close to him. “Whoah, Cas!—“ He leaned away from Cas’ face a mere inch close to his face that he can smell the vanilla, minty, pine scent.  And he can count Cas’ long eyelashes.

 

Cas held his jaw and his eyes widened, “Cas..” Heart thumped wildly beneath his ribcage.

 

And then Cas held his panic gaze, brows creased in concentration as he pinched something on Dean’s cheek.  Dean crossed his eyes staring suspiciously at Cas’ fingers. As long as Cas captured the culprit, he leaned away from Dean.

 

“This pharaoh ant is going inside your eyes.” Cas showed the tiny ant on his finger with fascination like he found the cure of the world’s deadliest venom.

 

Dean shocked and back still pressed on the window,  let out a shaky breath he was holding. “Wow, you’re...” He leaned away from the window and adjusted his butt back on the seat. “And here I thought you’d kiss me.” He chuckled to lighten up the awkward mood. Cas looked at him through his lashes with an intensity that Dean rolled his eyes.

 

“Why would I kiss you?” Cas asked innocently but his sarcastic tone betrayed it.

 

“Just—You know what, flick that little ant away before it’ll attack me again.” Dean crossed his arms and smoldered the road as he hid the creeping flush on his face. And Sam’s voice saying _‘man crush’_ echoed inside his head.

 

The green light blinked and the car moved at a slow pace. They settled back in silence that made Dean’s eyes droop, mouth hanging open, shoulder pressed on the window. If his life isn’t in danger, he would rather crawl and overtake Cas’ slower than a snail pace.

 

“Just so you know I crashed my car into a tree—“ Cas blurted out that made Dean came back down to earth and blinked his eyes blearily.

 

“What?” And Dean’s brain kicked into gear and realized maybe the guy’s a reckless ass driver. A drunk driver that killed a—

 

“I didn’t kill anyone.” Cas shifted the gear stick.

 

"I didn’t say that.” Dean obviously lied and Cas gives him a stink eye. “No. Yes. I mean, no, not like that. I’m just—“

 

“Tired and terrified.” Cas added.

 

“No, I’m just peachy and stuck  inside a pimp car that the reaper will overtake for good.” Dean huffed and shut his eyes.

 

The car suddenly shifted and he nearly crashes his face on the dashboard. Good thing his reflexes awake and alert. His eyes widened at Castiel who pulled the windows up and shifted gears again.

 

The car speed up and Dean braced himself on his seat as he fiddled the seatbelt helplessly.  He failed to connect the seatbelt. Because Cas swerved the car all too suddenly as he calmly managed and overtook random cars including a trailer truck that Dean just surrendered on the seatbelt and held on tightly, muttering curses under his frantic breath.

 

Dean heard the sound of each car like they protest and whine as they overtook.The surroundings beside the window blur like a mixed swipe of paintbrush strokes and he only focus on the front to calm a tad bit of his hammering heartbeat. Cas on the other hand, sat comfortably on his seat, one hand on the wheel with arms gently moving as he maneuvered the steering wheel.

 

Every gear he shifted like a pro car racer, eyes trained only on the road. Dean can’t help taking a quick glance at Cas beside him. And noticed the crease between Cas’ brows, the straight line of the bridge of his nose, chiseled jaw dusted with three-day unshaven stubble, and oh yes, those pink chapped pout of his lips—

 

Dean looked away and took a deep breath. In times of his dying days, he should not think with this kind of stuff. Especially when this guy pressed the red warning. And why the heck he’s crushing on a guy, on this guy whom he doesn’t like the first place?!

 

Dean stole a glance again at Cas but he froze when he noticed the tiny tug on Cas’ lips. He looked at him in the eyes only to be confronted by those cerulean blues. All the air sucked out of him. Cas heard everything inside his god damn friggin mind.

 

Yeah, awesome. He really shouldn’t think of that stuff ever again.

 

 

 

 

 

Sam stared boringly on the flat screen TV and yawned for the fifth time since he woke up from high induced morphine. His broken leg covered in a cast propped up on the bed. He flicked the remote and changed channels until he surrendered with a yawn.

 

He groaned as he stretched his arms. “That’s it I’m done.”

 

He slowly stood up and shut down the TV, broken leg lifted a few inches from the floor and balancing on the other like a tai chi master. Reaching the crutches leaned on the wall beside the table, he stopped as the lights flickered. He waited until the light flick back to life with a tiny buzz.

 

He huffed as he balanced himself on the single crutches limping slowly inside the bathroom. Turned the faucet and splashed his face with the icy water. He heard a noise behind the door now ajar open. A silhouetted figure stood a few inches from the door.

 

“Hey, Dean what took you so long?” He jokes and wiped his face with a rough face towel.  “How're your feelings towards your man crush?”

 

He expected a shoe flung across at him but none of it happen. He turned to the door as a concerned of a little brother gut kicks in him. “Dean?”

 

He simply goes to the door and the lights flickered again. “Is your man crush broke your heart already?”

 

As the lights above his head flickered he pushed the door open but saw nothing. No Dean in sight, he stopped, brows furrowed. He’s sure he saw Dean’s back, stood in front of the bed.

 

He sighed, rubbed his eyes with the heel of his palm. Maybe the side effects of the meds kick in. He goes back inside the bathroom and retrieves the other crutches he left yesterday.

 

Shuffled footsteps and a bang on the door made him flinch. “Wow, Dean! I’ll make sure to make him pay for breaking your heart!”

 

Another loud bang that the door rattled. He rolled his eyes and swung the bathroom door open.  Nobody in sight. This is too much of hallucinating then. He goes back to bed and flinched again as he saw Dean now stood on the door with his back on him.

 

“Jesus! You’re so funny.” Sam grabbed a pillow and throws it to Dean who didn’t even move. “So, you’re ignoring me now? I can talk to him you know and use my democratic speech.” He waited but Dean ignored him and just stood still.

 

“You’re getting creepy in that stance, man.” Nothing. So, he goes back to bed and turned on the TV. He glanced at the clock on the wall.

 

The ticking noise broke the deafening silence. He stared at the clock, mesmerized as the second hand reached the twelve Roman number. The buzzing noise on the TV forgot as the tick of the clock drowned the noise. Then it stopped.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Dean fidgeted on his seat and cursed when he remembered his phone forgotten on the hospital. There’s this sudden hunch that made him think of Sam worriedly. Crap, if the reaper shadow touched Sam—No, that’s impossible. Reaper shadow only wants his precious head.

 

He bit the inside of his cheek and glanced at Cas, “Hey, can I borrow your phone?” Cas just stared at him and he emphasized. “To call my brother.” Cas stared more, “Look, I forgot my phone, okay? I just want to check to make sure his alright—“ Cas handed his phone.

 

Dean smiled and dialed Sam’s number. Cas took advantage of the traffic going on as he keeps staring on that Dean’s cool acting on the verge of losing out. “Alright, I’m not doing this to get your number. I know how cool move this is—“ Sam didn’t pick up his phone god damn it.

 

He dialed again and grumbled to Cas, “Shut up and quit staring at me, man.” He listened to the dial tone mock him repeatedly.

 

“Fire.” Cas mumbled, eyes staring blankly on the road.

 

Dean stopped and handed Cas phone back, “What fire?”

 

Cas reached out and instead for his phone he held Dean’s hand.  Dean’s air sucked out all from his lungs. Vision swirled like a kaleidoscope and took him to another scene.

 

_Smoke. Fire. Sam. The tongues of fire grew larger eating the ceiling and Sam trying to get away from it, crawling. Dark smoke clouded the whole room. Sam tried opening the door but he_ _inhaled the suffocating smoke and ended up in a coughing fit. He fell down on the floor._

 

Cas let go of Dean’s hand as Dean hyperventilates. “Cas, we should hurry..” Dean said voice shook in fear, eyes wide.

 

And Cas for the first time Dean ever witnessed, his stoic icy glare fades replaced with concern in his eyes. “He’s going to be okay, Dean.” He said in his soft, calm voice as the car speeds up and cut through shortcuts avoiding heavy traffic.

 

Dean wants to protest of what Cas said but he shut his mouth and pushed the panic down.  How couldn’t even realized Cas did care for him? This weirdo cared for him.

 

_‘I have nothing to lose now.’_

 

And he blurted out of the blue, “Yeah, I trust you.” He noticed Cas stiffened a bit on his seat. Even himself was surprised by what he said.

 

 

 

 

 

The fire grew larger and surrounded the whole room. Sam lay flat on the floor with his stomach, suffocated by the strong waves of smoke rotating inside the room. His catching his breath, eyes stung with tears and dust.

He crawled towards the door and grab the blanket thrown on the floor. Wrapping his hand and reaching the doorknob, he winced as his broken leg throbbed and ached like pinpricks of needles stabbed and sunk into his flesh. Worst part scenario, he felt a trickle of something wet on his cast.

Too late he noticed his wound bleed because of the exertion of falling his ass off the bed, hit his casted leg on the hard floor. Wincing and grunting as he crawled, he swallowed the pain just to reach the door.

 

 

 

 

 

 

They arrived whole and safe in front of the hospital, the half of the building is burning. Firefighters aimed their hoses and sprayed water on the huge fire eating the building. Doctors, nurses and patients on askew, panic and cries loud.

 

Dean’s eyes widened at the fire towards Sam’s room and it fudgin’ exploded. The fire grew larger swirled in a different direction. Burning the things within reach.

 

“Sam!” Dean ran towards the burning building. But before he can leap his ass towards the fire and reach the entrance door, because no way he’s going to stand here and watched his brother toast alive.

 

“Let me in you motherfuckers—Sam! My brother’s in there—Sam!” He kicked and elbowed the shin of the men holding him. Another explosion and he ran towards the fire, “Sam!!!—“

 

Strong arms wrapped around his waist made him stop.

 

“Dean, stop.” Cas’ rough voice and panting warm breath close to his ear made him focused and he struggled away from Cas’ grip. “Please, Dean!”

 

Dean watched the door in front of him burst into the fire. He sagged on Cas’ arms as the guy held him, whispered reassuring words into his hair.  He rested his head on Cas’ shoulder, tears stinging on the rim of his eyes.

 

They watched the door burned but he stood still as he noticed the dark shadow stood inside between the ring fire. Another explosion and the door swung open. A burst of black smoke sputtered out.

 

The shadow vanished into thin air. The dark tendrils of smoke dissolved revealed a man lying on the floor. His painted in dark ash, long hair covered his face as he coughed hard.

 

Cas squeezed his hand gently and tugged back to reality. “Dean, look!”

 

The man rolled on his back and Dean’s eyes widened, voice shook and lips trembled. “Sam?”

 

Sam blew his tangled fringed off his face, squinted  and slurred hoarsely, “Dean?”

 

Dean ran towards Sam and crouched down beside his brother. “Okay, don’t move yet.” He noticed the bloody cast on Sam’s broken leg. He turned back to the rescuers. “Hey! A little help here!” He held Sam’s shoulder and pulled him into a seating position.

 

“I thought twa's you.” Sam slurred, head lolled and Dean rests it on his shoulder.

 

“Enough talk, Sammy—“

 

But Sam stubbornly turned and looked him seriously in the eye. “I thought –“ He swallowed, “It was you standing inside my room before the fire started all of a sudden like..it appeared out of nowhere.”

 

Before Sam continued, the medics took him inside the ambulance. Dean hauled his ass inside the ambulance and glanced back at the burning building. But something caught his eye; Cas.

 

Cas was facing something—Dean sucked in his breath as Cas took a step towards the reaper but it vanished again. Cas met his eyes. Deep inside he thought he heard a voice.

 

_‘Go now.’_

 

Surely that rough, graveled voice belonged to Cas as the guy waved a goodbye awkwardly. There’s worry etched on his face that made Dean’s chest tightened.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Luckily enough,  Sam’s knee isn’t the one bleeding but the new long gash right above his knee. The cast he wore didn’t have any cracks on it.  Yet, another stitch etched on his leg.

 

How awesome and strange.  Jody reported that nobody got hurt in the fire incident at the hospital. Fire Marshalls declared an electric short circuit went lose on Sam’s room. And Dean declared and highly concluded that yeah, it was one of this death thing messin’ again with him.

 

He didn’t sleep after that and stay awake for the upcoming Reaper to tear his head and limbs off into pieces and scattered it into the ether before taking his soul. He feared death but he feared most the people whom he cared will die because of him.Thinking of those people, after Jody’s short visit, Bobby, Ellen along with Jo, Ash, and Kevin in tow visited.

 

Bobby hid his worried side behind his gruffness. Sam, a little bit euphoric caused by the morphine, was glad and all giddy smiles of the people around him. Dean promised Bobby that he’ll come back to work after this thing will be over. But Bobby gruffly declined and threatened him again if he shows his face at work tomorrow.

 

And his adoptive father’s one step closer to asking him what the hell’s going on. Paired it up with Ellen’s suspicious stare towards him. But he’s glad she clamped her mouth shut.

 

Maybe she realized he will avoid her one million questions, in the end, no matter what threat she poured on hid head.  But the three musketeers (Jo, Ash, and Kevin) keeps on bantering about the fire incident. Ash planned on hacking something about the hospital’s blueprint.

 

Kevin backed him up on cracking up some private hospital files and Jo sat there all innocent face that promised trouble. As Sam approved their plans in his high state mind, thankfully Ellen and Bobby ushered the psychos out of the room with them. Later after that, Doctor Pamela came in with a clipboard wedged under her armpit and a tumbler of coffee on the other hand.

 

“Hey, there Sam!” Pamela said in her high pitch voice, beamed ear to ear.

 

Sam waved back lazily and smiled at her. She winked at Dean, eyes raked every bit of his body. Dean felt exposed and shuddered as he crossed his arms over his chest and nodded curtly at her.

 

She put the coffee tumbler on the side table and opened the clipboard. “Okay.” Scrutinizing her eyes on the x-ray result she was holding, she announced with a beaming smile. “No cracks. Except for your fractured knee of course.”

 

“So, he’s like..good to go?” Dean asked gruffly.

 

Pamela turned to him, smile replaced with a glare. “No, we’re not yet done with all the test. Plus, after that, a physical therapy is needed to strengthen and stretch the muscles. And weight bearing is not allowed for six to eight weeks.” Then she smiled, “No rush of bailing your ass out here, Sam.” She shut the clipboard and fetched her coffee tumbler as she beeline to the door. “Beauty rest, okay? Especially you, princess.” She winked again at Dean before shutting the door.

 

Dean blinked, retort words vanished instantly. Sam snickered. “Shut up.”

 

Sam piped up innocently typing on his laptop. “I never said anything...yet.”

 

Dean’s glare zeroed on Sam’s laptop. “And who the fuck smuggled that thing here?!”

 

“Jo.” Sam just shrugged, eyes riveted on the screen.

 

Dean rolled his eyes, sat on the edge of the bed and blew an exasperated breath. “So, congratulations you’ve got a steel leg now.”

 

“And I’ve got nine lives.” Sam retorted back as he nudged Dean’s thigh with his injured leg.

 

“Well, next to that you’re going to be Gotham’s dark knight.” He flicked Sam’s toes and his brother kicked him with his uninjured leg.

 

“That’s your dig, man.” Sam chuckled but his face shifted somber, eyes boring holes on is injured a knee. “Seriously, what happened there was really..strange.”

 

Dean bit the inside of his cheek as Sam continued, snapped his laptop close and placed it on the table.

 

“I swear, I-I saw you standing in front of the door. Your back turned on me, solid-human-3 dimensional being—and I thought you’re man crush dumped you—“ Dean made a face to Sam. “And you’re just in the process of moping.” Dean stared at Sam with disgust. “I find it hilarious.” Sam fudgin’ giggled. “You just stood there, not talking to me. I’m worried that maybe you forgot to move and transformed into a living statue.”

 

“Well, even if you’re still high I rest assured that that’s not me because newsflash I’m with this guy who didn’t let me drive his pimp of a car.”

 

Sam smirked, “I know. Oh, that’s a change in your relationship.”

 

Dean puffed his cheeks childishly in order to hide the creeping flush. “Shaddup. The guy’s a grandma when it comes to driving. But hell yeah, try bitchin’ him he’ll go Tokyo drift.”

 

But Samantha just leaned back on the headboard still wearing that _I-Know-what-you-hide-deep-inside-feels_ smirk. Dean grudgingly changed the topic before it goes highway to hell. But he knows Sam noticed it but let it go.

 

“So, what happened then? Where does the fire start?” He asked idly.

 

“I don’t know...” Sam stared blankly at the wall. “After I caught a shuteye, a doppelganger of yours was gone. The smoke already suffocating me.” He leaned away from the headboard, shifted on his side and reached the table drawer.  He opened it and rummaged something inside. “I must say, I was saved by the ring.” He fished out Dean’s phone and tossed it to him.

 

Dean caught it, tapped on the missed call icon on his phone. An unknown number appeared and he’s sure it’s Cas’ number. But he gasped and nearly squawk upon reading the registered name. “Honeybee? Really?”

 

“It fits, Dean. He liked bees.” Sam the Sasquatch said solemnly. And that’s where Dean’s brain turned its rusty wheel.

 

“How did you—Sam, you stalk the guy—“

 

“Hey, you supposed to thank me! I let my phone burn to save yours!”

 

Dean’s eyes widened, pointing an accusing finger at Sam. “You—Oh, my holy pumpkin fudge!—“

 

“Just an intense research on his Facebook.” Sam defended himself gestured his hands towards his laptop. “And well, not much of information I found about him. He’s 37, five years older than you. Lived in Pontiac Illinois..” The Nerdy face on. “But get this.” That’s the cue. “He’s the second youngest  son of Charles Shurley.” Dean just blinked and Sam rolled his eyes. “The famous novel writer of horror, thriller, supernatural and—“

 

“Voo-doo stuffs—“ He added airily.

 

“He disappeared twelve years ago after his wife and three kids died in fire—“ Dean shuddered a tad bit. “Which left Alfie and your Cas on an orphanage—“ And he air quotes with his fingers. But before Dean can scowl, he added his ramblings, “And Castiel got himself into a car accident two years ago.”

 

Dean stopped on his musing, “Oh, he mentioned that.”

 

Now Sam all of a sudden turned giddy again, bouncing on his bed. “The guy’s one of the best-known lawyers in Florida, Dean. But he quit for some unknown reason and took his brother Alfie with him.”

 

“And moved here in Lawrence for apple pie life.”

 

“Whatever the reason, I think it obviously pointing at you.” Sam held his gaze for suspense effects.

 

“I—“ Dean ran his hand through his hair and avoided Sam’s eyes. “They’re both psychics. He explained  to me that those creepy shadow thing I saw was some kind of –of—memo time—“

 

“Memetim.”

 

“Or—some kind of a reaper chasing after me and wants me dead after it’ll mess up the people I care.” Dean took a deep breath. “But Alfie.. the kid saw the warnings and..” His throat becomes dry and he stopped. Sam reached out and squeezed his shoulder reassuringly. “And now, Cas—after what happened to Alfie he chose to help me. It was supposed to be me, Sam. But instead the kid saved me—how should I even—“

 

“Dean, stop—“

 

“It’s bullshit, Sam. How come this thing just messes around instead of going straight ahead for me. I almost lost you if it wasn’t for Cas’ overly dramatic psychic thing. But I know he still hated me for what I’ve done to his brother—“

 

“Stop!” Sam’s voice raised and Dean shut his mouth. “You’re always overthinking, you know that?”

 

“My head’s on Death’s plate I can’t be peachy at all times.” He said drily.

 

“I know!” Sam snapped.

 

“Oh, so you believed me now?”

 

Sam looked offended but instead of biting back a retort he took a sharp breath, pinched the bridge of his nose. A muscle in his jaw twitched, “Whatever this reaper’s pattern, I think Alfie’s interruption triggered the process. And as long as you escaped death’s scythe, other’s life will be on his plate instead.”

 

Dean clenched his fist, “Yeah, right. Even Cas had no clue of why Alfie saved my ass. Freakin’ final destination.” He muttered and stood, “So, the only way to stop this thing is me.”

 

Sam’s eyes dramatically widened, “Dean, maybe there’s another way—“

 

“Yeah, sure. Except for nearly toasting you alive.” He snapped. “This thing is on me and I can’t let that son of a bitch took you all way from me.”

 

What a heroic thing to say. But his insides twist and churned that he nearly throws up in front of Sam.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

_Darkness._

 

_Shadows reached behind him as he ran blindly beyond the darkness. He can’t decipher the ground he’s trampling. Legs strained as he forced to ran away from the lurking shadows behind._

 

_Right. Left. Right. Left._

 

_A protruding muddy root coiled on his ankle sending him down on the dark mud. The acrid earthy smell went through his nostrils as he inhaled and he coughed. The shadow hovered above him as he struggled to his feet.Flailing and failing face down in the mud._

 

_But the shadows swallowed up by a blinding light. He winced upon the searing ball of light and shut his eyes. When he opened his eyes back, he’s standing on the top of a cliff._

 

_Endless white and still silence surrounded him.The dull, dark-green moss ground sunk as he took careful steps. He puffs a clouded breath as his heart didn’t waver a hammered beat._

 

_The acrid smell of burned flesh hits his nostrils and the pallet of his tongue down his stomach and he gagged. He peered down and met by the massive tongues of fire around the foot of the cliff. Dark smoke danced fluidly with the harsh wind and the crackle of fire echoed endlessly._

 

_“Wake up!”_

 

_A voice behind made him spun on his back but no one’s around. The fire grew larger eating its way around the cliff.There’s no way out._

 

_“Jump off!”_

 

_The voice muffled and got louder._

 

_“Jump off, Dean!”_

 

He woke up.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Dean didn’t sleep after that nightmare. Sam cast him knowing looks as he failed to hide the dark circles under his eyes. Thankfully, Sam shut his mouth about it. Pamela checked on Sam’s knee with so much enthusiasm as she caressed Sam’s thigh.

 

Screaming internally for help, Sam turned to Dean, face contorted in fear and horror. And like a good brother that he is, he just winked at Sam as Pamela squeezed Sam’s thigh. Sam give him the god mode bitch face fusion with death glare of the century.

 

Dean turned away and perched on the open window. The sky was dull gray, the ghost warm wind blows his hair. He noticed a crow perched on one of the branches of cottonwood tree across the street. It’s sharp red eyes stared straight at him.

 

It cawed twice with its stout bill. It didn’t stop until two more crows joined. And in a blink of an eye, hundreds of crows perched the branches like leaves. They cawed louder enough for Dean’s ears hurt.

 

He glanced down at the passers-by near the tree and strange as it is, they didn’t notice. He shut the window hastily and turned back to Sam. Pamela was out of sight and Sam sat his bed, phone wedged between his shoulder and ear, hands typing in a flash on the keys of his laptop.

 

Dean slowly turned back and glanced at the window. The creepy crows vanished. Death warnings again.

 

He heard Sam saying about the delayed of coming back to Florida and ended up spilling of what happened to him, minus the death chase stuff. Sam used his legal reasoning, evaded and changing the topic like he always did to Dean. After a few words of goodbye, he hangs up with a resigned sigh.

 

“You’re planning to stay—for how many days? Because I’m gonna kick your arse away from here as much as possible before the Reaper will strike back.”

 

Sam unleashed his begging puppy eyes and Dean’s inside twist. “Sorry, Dean. I already made up my mind.”

 

Dean clenched  his teeth and smoldered at Sam. “You’re going back to Florida after you bailed out.” He unleashed his _I’m-your-older-brother_ voice.

 

“What do you expect? I’m your brother, stubborn as you are.” The Sasquatch challenged him squaring his broad shoulder.

 

“I will still gonna kick your ass back to Florida hard enough your grandchildren can feel it.”

 

Sam’s bitch face intensified and Dean smirked internally screaming victory. But Sam’s bitchface dramatically changed into a sly smirk. Dean’s victory vanishes in thin air, eyes widened in horror.

 

“Only if..” _Oh, shit._ “..you’ll call him.” Sam triumphantly finished with a devious grin.

 

Dean glared at his brother hard enough to make a hole on his head. He huffed and he puffed and he took a sharp breath. “Jesus—Samantha. What’re you, five?!” He waved his hand in the air like batting an invisible fly.

 

“No, I just had enough of your Dean-ial and being a stubborn ass.” The bitch shrugged and grinned more.

 

 

“Sam, I don’t want to put him on this mess—Oh, his brother’s death counted and that is enough. This is on me, like a million times I told you—Bitch! Don’t you dare—put that down!—“

 

Sam snatched Dean’s phone lying clueless on the table and sent a text to Cas before Dean leaped on him and grabbed (at the same failing) his phone. Sam’s long arm was an advantage.

 

“You—I swear to God to fucking shave your head this time in your sleep—“

 

Dean lunged on Sam and wrapped his arms around Sam’s neck as his brother struggled with his grip and ended up clawing his eyes, nose, mouth then back on his nose. Sam hooked his finger on Dean’s nostrils and pulled it. Dean screamed in agony and Sam let out a battle cry.

 

They struggled in each other’s grip until Dean’s phone vibrated and they stopped. Staring at the phone wide eyed, Sam fished it first in a flash. He hastily grabbed the crutches and point it at Dean.

 

Sam’s grinning ear to ear as he reads the text. “Good to know you two were alright.” His grin froze. “Oh.”

 

Dean snatched his phone back. Wrinkling his nose but grinning as Sam pouted. “Look what I told you. You just hurt your feelings.The guy’s awkward and naive and..really awkward, weirdo—“

 

“You’re still goin’ to see him.” Sam stubbornly insisted and plopped back down on the pillow. His eyes droop as he groaned and slurred, “Just let..me deal with this..sshii..” And shut his eyes.

 

Dean watched Sam lulled into a deep slumber. He sat on the chair near the bed and sigh in defeat. Dealing with Sammy high on morphine is way worst than dealing a child with a temper tantrum.

 

Hesitantly, he read the text Sam sent to Cas.

 

**‘Hey, Cas! Just checkin’ in. We’re still alive and kicking. How’re you doin’ buddy?’**

 

_‘Good to know you two were alright.’_

 

Dean flinched as his phone vibrated on his hand. Another text from Cas.

 

_‘I guess I’m still alive and kicking too.’_ With smiley emoticon in the end line of the text.

 

Dean stared at the emoticon and chuckled. He typed for a reply.

 

**‘Well, see you maybe tomorrow?’** He deleted it and groaned. A few seconds later his phone vibrated again.

_‘Okay.’_

 

Dean stared at it, half bewildered, amused and happy Cas accepted his—wait. He isn’t asking a date—He took a deep breath and muttered, “It’s still creepy you heard me from here.”

 

_‘The “perks” of being a psychic. Goodnight, Dean.’_

 

**‘Goodnight, Cas.”** He tried to insert a smiley emoticon but accidentally sent the one with hearty eyes.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Despite his heroic decision of facing death, that every second count before the reaper will grab him, Dean’s not in the mood to get laid. The thought of making a bucket list or granting all the stupid things he wants to do before the deadline was replaced by Cas’ visit. He’s not excited about Cas meeting his Sasquatch of a brother. He’s just...

 

“Wow, why are you grinning?” And yep, Sam had 20-20 vision or maybe he’s too obvious. The latter seemed accurate.

 

Dean didn’t notice and thanks to Sam’s eagle’s eye he awkwardly cleared his throat and stood up. He caught his reflection in the window glass to his left side. Hair disheveled, dark circles under his bloodshot eyes. Damn, sleepless nights affects him this bad. He looks like a walking shit.

 

“You look like shit.” Sam stated the obvious and Dean turned around as his brother continued, “Why not you go home and get some beauty sleep. I promise to text you if Cas arrives here, okay?”

 

“That’s not—are you still high?” Dean heads to the door in case his brother won’t stop. “Call me when something's got awesome—“

 

“Yeah, yeah.” Sam shooed him, gestured his hand to the door.  His brows furrowed in a sober mode. “You too, be careful. We’re going to fix this. Make sure this will not be the last day, Dean.”

 

But no one knows when is that _last day_. So, he goes home and showered. But can’t sleep after 101 positions tossing and turning on his bed. He got up and changed shirt, jeans and checked himself in front of the mirror for the umpteenth time.

 

Checked his phone every minute. No text from Sam or from Cas. He took a walk outside to calm himself and passed Cas’ house. The usual creepy silence was an obvious sign the house is haunted and Cas isn’t home. Dean’s relieved of not knocking on that creaking, groaning in pain door.

 

The Impala’s still at Bobby’s shop so he gets a cab on his way back to the hospital. He can’t help twitching and flinching every time a disturbing noise or a sudden honk breaks down his reverie. Thank goodness he arrived at the hospital safe and whole and a little bit excited—not with Cas.

 

Despite his (as Sam put it) Dean-ial, he sent a text to Cas as he trudged inside the hospital’s hallway. And sure, yeah he’s grinning again as he read Cas’ reply saying he’s on his way and bought something for Sam and for him. His heart fluttered but he strokes it down before it’ll deflate into a huge air balloon.

 

It’s 6:45 PM and his stomach grumbled. The coffee he drank this morning faded its effects and he felt famished for the first time. He called Sam first before he goes back on his way to take a grub at the nearest 24/7 open diner. And dropped a text to Cas for Sam’s room number in case he got lost.

 

Even though he knows there’s an information center where visitors can simply know the patient’s room. And Dean’s just not really kind of excited. Shut up.

 

He tapped his phone and sent, **‘Sam’s at 15th-floor room 2188. Just barge in with your offering and the moose will not harm you.’**

 

He chuckled at his own joke as he walked down the stairs and turned right. A few minutes later Cas replied.

 

_‘Dean, I don’t understand. Why would Sam keep a moose with him? Isn’t that allowed?’_

 

Dean rolled his eyes and before he types a reply his phone chirped.

 

_‘Oh, you’re joking. Sam’s the moose.’_

 

Dean muttered, beamed like a dimwit on his phone.“Yep, you dork.”

 

He heard a ding as he passed an elevator. Its door opened but there’s no one inside. He stared at it as the music blared inside. The song isn’t familiar to him.

 

_And now, the end is near._

_And so I face the final curtain._

_My friend, I’ll say it clear._

_I’ll state my case, of which I’m certain._

 

A sharp noise resonated through his ears. Blinding light snatched the scenery in front of his eyes replaced by another scene flashed behind his eyes.  Darkness. A familiar rough voice washed over the ringing noise in his ears.

 

_“Dean..something’s wrong. I think I-I’m dying..”_

 

_Dean fluttered his eyes open. There’s blood—no, black goo on Ca’ skin, running and thrumming through his veins. He’s lying on the ground, back leaned on a worn dirty couch. He’s clutching on his bloody wounded side wrapped in a messy tourniquet._

 

_Dean’s hovered beside him, eyes widened as he heard those words. A gut-wrenching fear of losing him subsided but he stroked it down. As he looked into Cas’ eyes, there’s also fear in those around pools of blue._

 

_He swallowed the lump, “No..no, you just need some time, okay?”And he smiled reassuringly._

 

_Cas’ smeared blood lips twitched as if he’d say something to Dean but the blinding light took away everything in a single blink._

 

 

The lights flickered with ticking electric buzz. Dean felt a stinging pull inside his chest. What the heck was that?! Why was Cas hurt? Another death warning?

 

Shit. Who could this be this time? He remembered Sam. His first instinct kicked in as he staggered back, concentrating on the way back because shit, he won’t take that elevator. He will run the stairs to save his brother.

 

The flickering lights stopped and he halted too. Eyes widened, jumping from corner to corner for any suspicious movement. The deafening silence stretched a mile while he stood alone in the hallway.

 

Only the humming buzz of the lights above his head broke the silence. But he flinched as his phone vibrated in his back pocket.

 

_‘Where are you?’_

 

Oh, shit. Cas felt it too!

**‘Stuck in the hospital’s hallway. You?’**

 

Dean’s phone rang and he picked it up. Cas’ stern voice boomed.

 

_“Where exactly, Dean?”_ And there’s fear laced in his voice.

 

Shutting his eyes tight, he took a deep breath.

 

_“Dean!”_

 

Dean opened his eyes and swallowed hard, “Look, Cas I’m going to face this shit, okay? This thing won’t stop the killing spree if I don’t do this.” He licked his lips, “I’m sorry for Alfie..and Cas..thank you—“

 

He heard a loud crash and another loud bang on the other line. “Cas? What’s goin’ on in there?” But Cas didn’t answer in a few nervous beat. “Cas!” He heard a coughing fit and a muffled groan.

 

_“Dean, I-I think this elevator wants to swallow me whole.”_

 

“What?” Dean remembered his vision a minute ago. Fuck. Cas’ life is the next target. “I-I’m coming—Stay alive!” He hangs up and ran back to the exit.

 

He was about to call Sam when his phone shuts down.”Fucking tons of shit!” He ran as fast as he can. “Why is this hallway so damn long?!”

 

He had no idea where the heck Cas’ was trapped. He just follows the tingling sound of longing thing as his legs carried him. Until he reached the ground floor where the dim lit parking lot located.

 

Panting, hands on his knees, sweat on his temples, using his nearly 20-20 vision, he scanned the surroundings but none is a mess or wrong he found. He tried calling Cas but his phone was totally drained.

 

“Awesome.”He clenched his teeth, paced back and forth, scanned and peered every car hoping he’d see Cas. “C’mon, Cas!”  He heard a loud bang and he hastily turned around, ears perked up.

 

His eyes zeroed on the elevator and rest assured the noise coming from. He jogged towards it and scanned again. To his surprise, he noticed a smoke coming outside from the elevator door. “Fuck, maybe Cas’ trapped inside.”

 

Trying to peep the opening of the elevator door, he could see the cables, broken cables. Using his fingers and wiggled it inside the little space of the door, he tried to open it wide with all his strength and adrenaline. The door groaned as it opens a few centimeters wide, enough for Dean’s head to barge in.

 

More smoke coming out and he coughed a little bit as he peered inside. There’s broken dangling cables and wires and only one cable was in a good state. Eyeing the cable, he followed down the end of it until it reached to a gaping hole. As he stared at it with wide eyes, he remembered his nightmare on the cliff.

 

He shook himself and focused on the nearly collapsing elevator hanging with its left side cable, the only one clamped on it as his friend trapped inside. It’s so dark below that he can’t see if the elevator’s destroyed and he’s too late on saving Cas.

 

“Cas!” He heard another groan from the cable above his head. “Bang once if you’re alive!” Shit, he can’t forgive himself if—he heard a bang from beneath the dark.

 

He sighed in relief. Okay, good. No, not really that good. For now—he heard footsteps behind him and turned around. Two men in uniform trudged—securities. “Help!” He waved his arms awkwardly in the air snapping their attentions.

 

The securities ran towards him as one of them called back-up on his radio. “What’s going on in here, Sir?”

 

“Look, my friend’s trapped inside the elevator and he’s going down with it if we still keep chatting here.” Dean explained—well, kind of explain not in a sarcastic way as he peered down again.

 

The security who asked Dean peered down too and used a flashlight. And there he saw the elevator’s in a grave danger situation, tilted on its side like a hanged corpse, hung limply on its noose as the darkness’ mouth awaits to devour it.

 

The security guy hands him the flashlight as he called another back-up, barking out on his radio code red. As he’s holding the flashlight, Dean noticed the emergency door’s ajar opened. But Cas can’t go through with that.

 

He flinched as the elevator groaned and skidded down further. Sparks scattered like fireflies as the friction against the wall elevator ground each other.  No!No, no, no, nooo! Dean clenched his hold on the flashlight as he held his breath.

 

It stopped a few more inches down. He turned around as one of the rescuers ushered him away. They positioned their equipment to pull the elevator way up. And Dean’s prevents himself to jump over there and save Cas—

 

He closed his eyes, wishing Cas would hear him. **‘Are you hurt? Just bang once if you are, twice if you can still rip out some heads.’** He fluttered his eyes open as he heard a bang. Twice. He let out a breath of relief and he added, **‘Okay, the rescuers are here. You’re going to be okay, Cas. Just hold on, okay?’**

 

One loud Bang.

 

The rescuers finally connected their harness and agonizingly pulled the elevator up that groaned in protest. It took several minutes or maybe hours until the elevator’s half body—hah! emerged above the messy hole and the rescue team halted. One of the rescuers managed of opening the top emergency door wide.

 

A few seconds later, Cas’ mop of messy dark brown hair emerged from the emergency door.

 

Dean hurriedly reached Cas’ hand and gripped it tight. “There you are.”

 

Cas blinked at him in surprise, big blue eyes stared at him. “ Where should I suppose to go?”

 

Dean smiled a relieved smile. “Yeah, whatever.”

 

Cas squeezed back on Dean’s hold as Dean pulled him out until his upper body is out but the elevator skidded back down a little bit. Dean held him now with two hands, struggled of pulling him out.

 

Cas’ wide eyes stared at him, a pleading look appeared just like _the Cas_ in his vision he saw earlier.“Dean—just—just let go.”

 

Dean held Cas’ now sad gaze and gritted his teeth as he pulled him once again. “No—I won’t! I won’t let you go now that I have you, man!” _And I don’t care how that sounded so chick flick!_ “Not you or the people I cared about! I’m not gonna let you go. Trust me, okay?”

 

Something in Cas’ eyes changed and he gripped Dean’s hand back. They heard commotions of shouting voices behind them as the cable finally pulled apart. “It’ll collapse! Hold on! Pull! Pull!!!”

 

Dean held Cas’ gaze.

 

The elevator fell down with a loud bang as it hits the ground. Holding Cas’ hand; whose now hanging and watched the elevator sparked and exploded. The fire lifted up like lurking shadows on Dean’s dreams.

 

It ran towards Cas and Dean pulled him up away from the licking tongues of fire before it reached his feet. Dean panted, knees rested on the ground. He held Cas’ face with searching eyes.

 

“You saved me.” Cas said eyes stared in amazement to Dean.

 

“Yeah.” Dean pulled Cas in his arms and hugged tightly. He let out a shuddered breath, “Yeah.” He felt Cas’ arms wrapped around him.

 

Cas earned a few little burns and scrapes on his thighs up to the side of his torso. The strange thing again, the operator’s monitor and the camera didn’t catch any explosion and they don’t hear any of it. The police either had no trace of explosives of their investigation nor a witness.

 

Dean, on the other hand, wants to flip a bird to the reaper. He felt smug a little bit and challenged the reaper to keep showing him signs. Because he’s not gonna surrender the people he loved—ahem! He cared. Okay, cause he’s not that cruel.

 

Cas is a good guy like it doesn’t mean he doesn't look at you doesn't like you. Add up the being weird and awkward, sass. And Sam’s way over worried and relief upon knowing what they’d been into lately. But his dramatic lecture to Dean has been cut off. Thanks to Cas.

 

And Sam’s nervously reached Cas’ hand for a handshake. “Sam, I—I’m Sam—really, I-I’m really glad to meet you, sir—“

 

“Just call me Castiel or..” He glanced at Dean, “Cas.” He shook Sam’s hand without being started.

 

Sam grinned like a kid on Christmas receiving gifts and Dean can see how much his brother fangirled Cas. “Yeah, Cas.” He said sheepishly and let go of Cas’ hand.

 

They started the nerdy talk. Cas’ offered food was lost along the elevator. So, Dean grabbed some cheeseburgers, rabbit food for Sam and pie of course on their way. Cas liked it though savoring the juicy burger but reprimanded Dean’s unhealthy eating.

 

Dean sat there on the corner legs propped up on the table, flipped the magazine idly. On the corner of his eye, he watched Sam animatedly talked to Cas. Cas attentively listened, shoulders lax and not the usual stiff Dean always saw.

 

His posture, as Dean described was like the Cas before the shit hit the fan. He watched the two people saved by the reaper’s wrath. Maybe Alfie saved him for this.

 

Cas smiled as he glanced at him for a moment. He remembered the first day they met, Cas’ anger towards him.

 

_‘I wanted to punch you right now.But it’s useless..it won’t bring my only family back to life.’_

 

_‘I have nothing to lose now.’_

 

The first time he noticed the tug on Cas’ lips as the guy heard his gay thoughts. And yeah, up until now he’s still denying that thing. Cas’ brow furrowed as he met his gaze. He suddenly heard a familiar graveled voice inside his head.

 

_‘Thank you, Dean, for saving me and for the cheeseburger.’_

 

Dean blinked and wondering as Cas turned back his attention to Sam. That’s the second time he heard Cas’ voice inside his head.

 

 


	3. Chapter 3

 

   _Darkness._

 

_Voices crying out of pain, torment and anguish echoed. Rotten, burned flesh and the coppery smell of fresh blood wafted that made Dean’s stomach hurl. He struggled and lashed out, pulled his arms but the large stained, rusted hooks pulled back every inch of his skin and flesh. He tries to utter a word but instead, a  shout of pain came out from his mouth as one of the hooks dug deeper into his chest._

 

_“Saaaamyyy!!! Help me!!!” He shouted, ragged and out of breath. But the cries got louder, drowned each drawn syllable he spat from his trembling chapped lips._

 

_A struck by lightning shone in a flash and it roared ferociously like an angry beast. It nearly hit where he hangs upside down from the chains._

 

_The chains rattled as he flinched, terror drowned him. “Somebody help me, please!!!” He felt wetness ran down his cheek, expecting a salty taste when it reached on his lips. Licking it, he tasted copper instead. Blood._

 

_He shut his eyes tight and held his breath. Regrets and overwhelming fear swam inside his head. The next second he opened his eyes, he can’t move. His limbs no longer tied up and hooked up by the chains. He sucked out for air and hands shot, fumbled anything in his pockets only to retrieve a lighter._

 

_He flicked the light off and gasped for air upon realizing he’s inside a coffin. His own coffin. He coughed and shut his eyes only to open it again by a loud bang. A searing hot pain on his left arm made him shuddered._

 

_He found himself back inside the barn. Shielding his eyes with his arm raised as more flickered lights shattered, a man wearing a tan trench coat stood in front a few inches away from him. A familiar coat._

_“_

_Who are you?” He asked, guarded._

 

_The man’s face blurred as it turned to him. “I’m the one who gripped you tight and raised you from perdition.” And he’s got those familiar gravel voice._

 

 

A loud bang jolted Dean awake, panting, chest heaving, eyes widened in shock. That nightmare again. He sat on his bed, back leaned on the headboard as he took a few deep calming breaths. Wiping his face, he stood up and retrieved a whiskey on the kitchen hidden one of the cupboards.

 

The loud, harsh, heavy rain pouring alongside with the clap of thunder strikes near his house isn’t enough to calm his nerves. He took a long swig and rubbed his eyes with the back of his palm. Another loud clap of thunder hits hard that made the ground shook.

 

Dean flinched, coughed and nearly sputtered as the whiskey ran through his nose instead of down his throat. And the wall clock’s alarm blared 3 AM, reminding him back to the time when everything started to shoot. He remembered Alfie as he glanced at his window where Cas’ creepy house was visible.

 

The lightning of the thunder made it look more hunted. And the light on the post stood beside the street keeps on flickering. But his eyes grew wider when he saw a familiar black sleek of car in front of Cas’ garage.

 

He sucked in his breath, “Fuck. Why are you always running in there?”

 

He hastily moved away from the window and slumped back down on his couch and took a long swig from the bottle of whiskey. What’s new to this creepy thing anyway? Except that yeah, all of this was new and he’s not used to it. But no, he doesn’t want to get used of this supernatural thingy, he wants this to end. Maybe if he ends this now...

 

He stared at the bottle he was holding but stopped his suicide attempt thoughts. Death itself would just laugh how silly of him surrender just like that. As if death will stop chasing the people he loved.

 

Thoughts of Cas appeared in his mind. Right. Cas will haunt him again and again if he’ll do some stupid decisions. And Sam will support Cas because of how stubborn and stupid he is. This is not just about him anymore. Sam believed him. Cas saved both Sam and his ass and he won’t that go to waste.

 

He slowly shut his eyes, bottle of whiskey cradled on his arm as he listened to the sound of falling rain. The next thing he opened his eyes the sun’s rays already peeked through the window. His phone blared _‘Ramble on’_ as Bobby’s name printed on the screen of his phone.

 

Dean put down the half bottle of whiskey on the coffee table and fetched his phone.

 

Bobby’s gruff voice on the other line greeted him. “You took the car.”

 

Dean ran a hand through his hair, “Yup.” He lied and took a frustrated sigh.

 

“Somethin’ goin’ on with ya, boy. I can smell it from here.”

 

Dean chuckled, of course, whose he’s fooling. “Thanks for your concern, Bobby but uhm..I’m good..” He bit his lower lip. “Yeah, definitely good and sunshine feels and good..”

 

Bobby sighed, “I’ll see you Thursday and we’ll talk.” He hangs up.

 

Dean put down his phone back on the coffee table and took a glimpse of his car as he slowly turned his head towards the window. And yup, he did flinch once again, scooted far more away from the window like a scared cat.

 

“Fuck, Cas! That’s just creepy!” And too late he realized he’s stupid because Cas can’t hear him beyond closed window as the guy’s furrowed brow and head tilt showed.

 

Huffing, he stood and yanked the window open. “What.” He never meant to sound angry and pissed. But hey, his attention zapped on Cas’ tan trench-coat.

 

“Your car, Dean.” Cas replied on his stoic yet this time Dean didn’t miss the tiny smirk going on on Cas’ lips that Dean wants to wipe it with a kiss—

 

“Yeah, that..” Dean cleared his throat, avoided Cas’ intense laser eyes stare because the dork heard him again. Why the fudge he even think of that?! Damn, he’s straighter than a straight line on a pedestrian lane. It’s Cas’ fault why his lips were so—okay. Stop.

 

“Another supernatural thing happened again.” He added gruffly and if he felt his cheeks warm, he just masked it with his manly bravado smirk.

 

But the more Cas just stood there and stared at him, his cheeks got warmer and knee weaker. Not until their staring contest cut off by a loud embarrassing grumble of his stomach. Announcing and at the same time protesting for food, real food and not some alcoholic, coma-inducing coffee.

 

So, he asked sheepishly, “Breakfast?”

 

Cas just shrugged, “Of course.”

 

Dean drove the Impala along with Cas beside him. They bantered as Dean’s classic rock music blared on the radio and Cas harshly commented on it.Well, harsh for Dean when somebody insulted or didn’t like his choice of music. No wonder, Sam, and Cas got along.

 

To Dean’s surprise how famished he is now, his fingers trembled. Vision getting blurred but he stomped it down.

 

“Take this.” Cas handed him an energy bar thrust hastily towards his face and if he didn’t move aside fast, he’ll hit by Cas’ knuckles. He stared at the bar then grimaced as he stared back at the road. He took it grudgingly, muttering, “I don’t like this vegan flavored shit. Man, really? It’s supposed to be all sugar and not mixed with some tasteless vegan nuts.” He fumbled to open it but Cas took it back and Dean is on his way to protest and yank it back but Cas opened it with his sinful mouth.

 

Cas tore the wrapper with his teeth and thrust it back to Dean. “Sometimes, the things you don’t like can save you.”

 

Dean doesn’t know if Cas was referring to the energy bar or to himself as he snatched it back and shoved it in his mouth in one go. Cas shook his head but then he all goes rigid, eyes widened. Dean held his breath for Cas might saw another vision. Cas slightly parted his lips, leaned away from his seat, hands braced on his sides.

 

“Cas?..” Dean asked cautiously when Cas opened his mouth, nose crinkled, eyes narrow. Then—

 

Cas sneezed. He blinked those round pools of blue and turned to Dean. “What?” He sniffed, scrunching his nose again and leaned back on his seat.

 

Dean’s lips quivered before he chortled. The remnants of his nightmares vanished in an instant. Cas glowered at him but he ignored it, wheezing as Cas now glowered the road, cheeks tainted a blossom of pink. “Dude, that was..” _Cute._ “..you sneezed like a cat.” Fuck, he’s screwed.

 

When they arrived at the diner, the waitress stole flirty glances at Cas whose oblivious flipping idly on the menu. Dean glared daggers when the waitress; Sophie, touched and squeezed Cas’ arm. However, manly as he is, he ignored it and slammed the menu on the table.

 

He plastered his one million worth smile that made all the women swoon and drops their bras. But it ended up a sneer as the waitress moved away from Cas taking their orders. The next their orders arrived, Sophie didn’t do her moves to Cas and throw fear glances at Dean.

 

They devoured their food, moaning as they munched their double cheeseburgers. Dean stiffened when Cas moaned back. His eyes tracked the juice slipped, running down past Cas’ lips. Before it reached his chin, Cas used his thumb, wiped it and sucked the juice with those sinful lips.

 

Dean’s eyes widened as his breath hitched and groin starts to twitch. After their breakfast, Dean called Sam just checking and pestering.  While Cas waited stood near the sea at the back of the diner, back leaned on the door of the Impala, arms crossed wearing his usual furrowed brow.

 

The wind rustled his hair and flipped the edge of his coat. As soon as Dean hang up, he stood beside Cas, watched the waves and the seagulls flying above their heads.

 

“I’m not really a psychic.” Cas blurted out and Dean almost missed it as the wind blew harshly.

 

Dean turned his attention to Cas, hands shoved inside the pocket of his jeans. “Yeah? So what’re you? One of Professor X’s minion?”

 

Cas didn’t take his sarcasm. “I’m sort of  a visionary.. ghost is not one of my “perks”.” He air quotes with his fingers awkwardly. “I can hear thoughts but not reading minds. I can see memories by holding things..” He turned to Dean and met his eyes. “And then, there’s you. Every time I touched you... I can see the forthcoming danger and other unexplained things and it’s a first.”

 

Huh. Well, that’s—wait. Why is Cas telling him about this?

 

“Back at the burning hospital when I left you there, you didn’t saw the creepy shadow stood in front of you?” Dean asked tentatively.

 

Cas shook his head, “I can only felt it’s presence.”

 

“Huh. Lucky you.”

 

“I’m the exact opposite to it.” Cas stared back to the sea, eyes a tad bit weary and Dean can’t help staring every feature on Cas’ face as his stomach fluttered.

 

Whatever Cas’ past he wants to know. And maybe took him on a—

 

“Yeah. Whatever. I’m still lucky you saved me and Sam..and I’m not sorry my car likes blocking your driveway.”

 

Cas looked back at him and held his gaze, a real smile plastered on his face. He can’t help but smile back.

 

“Before...I escape the fear, pressure, pain...instead of overcoming it. Until the car accident happened and reality around me warped up into something unexplainable. Endless choices, things that are overwhelming ..changed the path I used to take.”

 

“I thought having that gift is cool, y’know, seeing stuff that a naked eye can’t.”

 

“It’s more than a curse..sometimes I don’t know what’s real anymore.”

 

Dean can relate to that because he also shares the same struggle before and now. After the car crash incident that burned his mother, his father died in the hospital after struggling for months and at a young age, he can’t carry the burden of being a parent for Sam. But he did by squashing his child side.

 

There comes a moment when he forgot who he is, masked and pretended that everything was okay when in reality is the opposite side of the coin. But like he said, he’s lucky enough to have those people on his back reminding him of who he is. But for Cas’ situation, especially now that he’s all alone, Dean wants to hold him. He glanced at Cas’ hand but averted his eyes back down to Cas’ shoes. Sensible shoes.

 

“But then..this..” Cas slowly clutched his chest, “This felt real.”

 

Dean looked up back to Cas and they locked gazes, “Yeah?..” His eyes drifted to Cas’ lips then back to his eyes.

 

But Cas didn’t hold their gazes that long as he averted his eyes down. “You know I’ve—I’m twisted and broken—I should stay away from you but..” He sighed and added a whisper, “I can’t..”

 

“Is it because of your psychic perks things?”

 

Cas hesitated, stared to Dean then back to the road. “No.”

 

Dean swallowed nervously because he doesn’t want to know but his mouth kinda betrayed his mind. “Then what?”

 

Cas stared back at him, “Should I spill?”

 

Dean shrugged, “It’s up to you.”

 

Silence cut between them except for the lapping noise of the waves and the choking calls of the seagulls above.

 

Dean took a sharp breath, “You know what?” He faced Cas and took a step closer, personal space be damned. “You should answer me instead of answering my question with another dumb question.”

 

“Then don’t asks stupid questions.” Cas retorted back, frowning.

 

Dean licked his lips, “Oh yeah?” He leaned close to Cas’ face, challenged the man.

 

And Cas took the challenge heartily and met Dean’s eyes. They’re so close that Dean smelled and felt Cas’ warmth breath on his face. The smell of cinnamon mixed with pine awakened his senses and pushed away his _manly_ issues.

 

Their foreheads touched, lips nearly brush. But Dean’s panic overtook him and he leaned a little back but Cas followed him close and bumped their foreheads hard. With that, they groaned but Dean laughed and soon Cas followed.

 

Dean’s stomach does the strange flip once again upon hearing Cas’ laughter and watched Cas laugh for the first time. “That’s it, you finally laugh—“

 

Cas held his nape, pulled and kissed him. This time angling without their foreheads bumping. It was a chaste, short kiss and Dean’s surprised of how soft Cas’ lips is. But they stared more to each other and Dean pulled Cas closer and kissed him again. _Straight_ be damned he wants to taste Cas’ lips since the guy stood on his doorstep.

 

Cas gasped and Dean took advantage, slipped his tongue inside Cas’ warm mouth. But he moaned when Cas swirled his tongue and sucked his bottom lip. Even though he’s in the euphoria of his first kiss with a guy, he didn’t miss the song of _Whitney Houston’s I will always love you_ blared inside the diner.

 

Behind his closed eyes, he felt Cas’ warm solid body under those layer undershirt and trench-coat, he skimmed his hands under Cas’ coat. Ran his fingers on the curve of Cas’ back, traced the column of his spine. Colors busted out in different patterns inside his head.

 

Cas’ right arm wrapped around his waist, the other hand held his nape, nails gently scratching at the short hairs on the back of his neck. Then it runs to his cheek, thumb traced gentle circles. The slight burn of their stubble jaw rubbed against each other and Cas’ warmth and the flavor was all in all weird. But made him smile, content and happy.

 

He had countless make-out sessions but this. Gee, it’s like floating on a cloud nine basis and confirmed that his sappy side is affected too. And he’ll not gonna hear the end of this if Sam would know.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Because of Sam’s awesomeness of doing 24/7 research stuff, determination of getting info and analyzing everything he wanted to know flared up to top notch. He found another _not-so-known_ psychic near the state; luckily enough a friend of Chuck. But the fire of determination died down replaced by a kicked puppy face because Dean pulled out litanies of _‘No, stay here.’_ in different mocked stern tone.

 

Dean, of course, expected a disappointment will be written on Sam’s face but the Sasquatch threw him a smirk. That kind of _I-know-something-and-you’ll-suffer-of-hurting-me s_ mirk. And then Sam glanced at Cas then back at him just waggled his brows.

 

Dean froze and conscious as he glanced back worriedly at Cas whose oblivious of Sam’s murderous plan.  He absentmindedly traced his lips with his fingers. Is it written all over his face that he kissed a guy?

 

He checked his inner manly side. Nothing changed though, he still likes women but never eyed on men except Cas. We’ll Cas is..is different and—The Love at first _fright_ words echoed inside his mind and he squashed and pulverized it in microscopic pieces. Whatever _this_ is it’s impossible to squash down, it’ll transform into a huge air balloon the more he denied _it_.

 

They arrived somewhere in Kansas that Google map satellite wouldn’t even detect that the place exists. It’s a freaking hideous wood cabin in the middle of the forest and an ostentatious swamp behind it. Dean slapped his face as a mosquito landed on his cheek. “This is going to be—“ Slapped his other cheek. “Awesome! Really?”

 

Cas ignored his dramatic whining as he marched into the woods. Dean followed behind muttering curses as more mosquito bit him like they’re getting revenge. They followed a trail made of pebbles towards the cabin. And Dean stubbed his foot on a god damn protruding rock like it was meant for him to stumble and tripped.

 

But before he hits his face on a damped rocky ground, Cas caught him. Wrapped his right arm around Dean’s waist while the other hand on his shoulder as he pulled and straightened him up. Cas wasn’t a fan of talking and just held Dean’s hand as they continued their trek. Dean smiled and squeezed Cas’ hand in reassurance. Of course, he’d deny that he didn’t felt tingly.

 

They arrived in front of a huge, dirty white painted French style gate. Complete with real red roses swirled all over the hinges. Dean took a step back and gestured to Cas to destroy the rusty gate. Cas just rolled his eyes as Dean picked up a rock.

 

“This is simple, Cas. Throw this on that cabin’s window and viola! A pissed off grumpy, bearded old man will appear in no time!”

 

Cas looked up to the sky and let out a long-suffering sigh. “Right. I can’t promise to call Sam to bail you out.”

 

Dean smirked, “Nah, no need. You’ll gonna miss me immediately.” He threw a flirtatious wink at Cas who smirked back.

 

But before Dean can do the honors of breaking a window, Cas reached the doorbell hidden beneath the roses. He pressed it and their eyes widened as they heard the intro of _Careless whisper_ song. Followed by voices—

 

_“Oh, yeah! Right there! Ride me, baby! Paint it inside me!”_ Followed by more groans, gasps and loud skin slapping.

 

Dean dropped the rock and covered his ears while Cas’ face contorted in horror. A few seconds of terror later, the huge gate groaned and creaked. Dean held his breath as the huge gate opened dramatically.

 

There’s a light along with a smoke came out. A person stood in the center, arms raised. The guy took his steps and every step echoed and Dean swallowed nervously. Cas held his shoulder and braced his self in front of Dean.

 

The smoke deflated and the man’s face revealed as he coughed and give Dean and Cas a huge grin after. On the guy’s hand was a ..cane.

 

“Come in, gentlemen!” The guy twirled his cane playfully.

 

Before Dean and Cas can reply, he ushered them inside, bumped his cane along the way. Yup, the guy’s blind but Dean had enough weird happened in his life now. So, the _how the fudge_ questions lurking inside his mind dissolved.

 

They stopped a few meters away from the wood cabin house. Dean raised his left brow when the said psychic gestured his hand on the near coffee table under a cottonwood tree. The chairs and tables a mocking French intricate art on it too.

 

“Have a seat.” The psychic sat across after Dean and Cas sat on the opposite side, throwing knowing looks and mouthing _He’s a cougar!_ by Dean. He raised a teacup to his mouth, Pinkie possibly raised.

 

Dean awkwardly drank his tea as he glanced to Cas who did the same but glaring at the psychic. Huh. Maybe they’re trying to read each other's mind because the psychic held Cas’ gaze and plastered a Cheshire cat grin on his face.

 

“Hey, hot cheeks you can wait inside that black sexy car. I have some important matters to discuss with your boyfriend.” The psychic said then slurped noisily on his tea.

 

 Before Dean could violently react and punch the guy’s face, Cas stood abruptly with wide blue eyes stared at the psychic. He took a step back, body rigid and then turned around and left Dean.

 

“No, wait—Cas!” Dean turned to the psychic, “What the hell did you do to him?!”

 

“Chillax, lover boy is okay there. The information is all for you and I don’t want to spoil everything.” The psychic shook his head disappointedly, mouth pursed.

 

Dean clenched his teeth and leaned close to the guy. “Then spill it out.”

 

“Oh, sorry to be rude. Names’ Gabriel Angelo—“

 

“I don’t care.” Dean gritted out, glaring daggers intensified.

 

Gabriel sighs and sagged on his seat. The ticked silence made Dean’s hair at the back of his neck stood. Only the annoying buzzed of mosquitoes heard between them.

 

“Your moose of a brother was right. Alfie destroyed the order.” Gabriel said as Dean only furrowed his brows.

 

“You’re drilling inside my head.”

 

Gabriel shrugged, “It fizzles out on you, Deano. So, no need trying hard to read that messy noggin’ of yours. I’m totally amazed how Cas easily access on that.” He clasped his hand and rested his chin on it.

 

Dean, on the other hand, was still weirded out about this freaky psychic as the guy bit their names. Sighing, he ran a hand through his hair and leaned back on his seat. “All right, can you help us or we’re just gonna sit here and look pretty?”

 

Gabriel chuckled and slapped the table two times. But then he leaned back, face serious on full throttle. “Alfie did it for Castiel’s safety because this whole _death chase_ stuff is not on you Dean.”

 

Dean stared at Gabriel, slowly analyzing and realizing the words. He opened his mouth but Gabriel cut him off.

 

“The big BUT—not that other _butt_ —maybe on the other side of this reality, you two morons were important to Cas.”

 

Now Dean’s more way confused, “What—“

 

“I told you, I can’t spoil the story or else things will get worse. It’s not my digs but yours to find it out.”

 

Dean opened his mouth once again but then shuts it as soon as everything’s clear and hit him hard in the face with a french styled chair. His eyes widened in horror.

 

“Just put it this way. Millions of other alternate reality and dimensions were out there. A few of them were also yours but only one thing prevailed and connected all the empty holes of that other reality of yours. That _profound bond_ keeps holding and reviving you. Now right here, all you can do for now is save him.” Gabriel popped a candy into his mouth.

 

 

 

 

 

Dean’s ninety-nine percent sure he didn’t buy Gabriel’s bluff but the one percent tolerated and convinced the ninety-nine percent of his doubt. He spills everything to Cas once he arrived where he parked the Impala. Cas didn’t utter a word after that and the silence shifting between them was their company on the ride back home.

 

And now, Dean’s worried about Cas, about the thing they’re in and the thing they have, if ever they have _that._ Neither he or Cas talked about the kiss after Gabe ruined the moment. As if crushing baby’s steering wheel on his grip will make everything brighter than the sunshine and Cas will tell what’s inside his head.

 

So, Dean doesn’t fidget on his seat because yeah, maybe Cas will—

 

“It makes sense now..my family, the people I loved. I should stay away from you, Dean—“

 

“But you can’t—“ Dean gritted out sternly as he whipped back to Cas, stepped on the brakes causing baby to halt in the middle of the road. He ignored the few cars cursing him.

 

Cas looked down at his lap, defeated. Swallowed and turned back to Dean but Dean cut him off.

 

“No, Cas—just no—“ His voice wavered a bit as his emotions welled up.

 

“Dean, I can’t forgive myself if I lose you!” Now Cas’ eyes turned glassy but there’s anger, fear, and hope in there.

 

“And you think I can?” Dean is ready to spill out his feelings god damn it. Cas resigned, weary and sadder that made his anger hormones abate. “Like I told you back on the elevator. I’m not leaving you.”

 

“Dean—“

 

Dean grabbed Cas’ lapel of his coat and pulled him into a hug. “Shut up.”

 

Cas went still on his arms and Dean tightened his grip until Cas relaxed and hugged him back. He nuzzled on the crook of Cas’ neck and inhaled the familiar scent. He felt Cas shuddered on his arms and a glint of tear ran down on his cheek. “I’d rather have you, cursed or not.”

 

Dean pulled away and looked into Cas’ eyes now a little rim red. He wiped the tracks of tears with his thumb on Cas’ cheeks. Cas caught his hand, turned it palm up and brought it to his lips, kissed the back of Dean’s knuckles. Dean can’t help turned beet red but he didn’t let go of Cas’ hand the whole ride.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Dean almost didn’t let go of Cas’ hand as he dropped him at the convenient store. “Sure you’re okay?” He hesitantly asked and clenched his grip on the steering wheel, eyeing Cas warily stood outside the Impala.

 

Cas leaned down and peered into the window and give a thumbs up. Dean continued though, “ Call me if everything starts to get nasty—“

 

“Got it.” Cas cut off his almost rambling of worry and waved a gesture of goodbye. He watched Cas’  retreating back and pushed out the worry gnawed deep inside his guts.

 

Finally, even against his will of leaving Cas whose bare on that shadow thing, he forced himself away and goes his ass back to the hospital. Sadly, he missed Dr. Barnes checking Sam just to playfully mock and teased his brother. Thinking of his said brother, Sam automatically shut the lid of his laptop with a snap and turned stern and crossed arms.

 

“So, did you found the guy?”

 

Dean huffed and sat on the chair near the window. “Yup.”

 

“And?”

 

“He can’t help us.”

 

Sam’s bitch face showed up, “You didn’t punch him or did you?”

 

“I wish  I could. Hell, he deserves more—“

 

“Spill.”

 

Dean sighs and ran a hand through his hair then down his face and spilled everything to Sam. Of course, keeping the other detail of how Cas reacted to it.

 

Sam worried his bottom lip and stared concentrate on the far wall behind Dean. “I was wondering about this other real thing.” He mumbled more to himself.

 

“Yeah, I should’ve drag you to talk to that psycho. “ Dean mock playfully, crossed his arms on his chest.

 

But Sam still internally on his realization mode, “ And the only thing that could stop this whole kind of death chase is..” He trailed off, met Dean’s eyes worriedly.

 

Dean’s jaw ticked as he clenched his teeth, face hardened in an _If_ _looks can kill_ way. “No, I and Cas talked about it. So, no I’m not gonna leave him and deal with this alone, Sam.”

 

But Sam unleashed his _sympathy eyes_ as he knows what Dean feels behind those words. Dean almost throws a pillow to Sam. “But you’re not in this game.” He said softly and Dean doesn’t like where this is going.

 

“Sam, I hope you remember Alfie specifically saved our asses back there even though he destroyed this whatever order.” He gritted out harshly.

 

“Dean, that’s not the real reason. “ Sam’s eyes softened and Dean stopped, looked down. His brother can read him like an open book damn it. And yup, Sam reached Dean’s shoulder and squeezed it gently. “I understand.”

 

Dean looked up to Sam and he nearly cries out loud. “Oh my god, you’re a man with a woman’s hair indeed.”

 

Sam punched his shoulder. Dean punched back but Sam used his leg wrapped in a cast.

 

Dr. Barnes checked on Sam for the last moment and reminded him about the therapy. After they checked out, of course, Sam insisted on paying the bills and Dean protested to no avail. As soon as they arrived at their house, Dean keeps glancing on his phone minutely and hopefully, Sam didn’t notice. Of course, he’s wrong.

 

He left his brother lounging on the couch with his precious laptop and took a shower. His thoughts drifted off what Gabriel said. The nightmares become vivid and real or is it really a dream?  Or maybe Gabriel might be right.

 

Before he’s going to drown on his thoughts, he padded back to his room and changed into black t-shirt and jeans. He checked back on Sam now fingers typed in a flash on the keys. Dean sat down on the single couch with a beer in hand.

 

The tapped noise of the keyboard distracted Dean’s inner turmoil and manly issues. He knows that this kind of stuff is Sam’s field. Sam’s way more had a clear eyesight and mind on seeing the bigger picture instead of moping, hiding and denying like what he did. It’s one of the reasons why he’s so proud of Sam.

 

“Isn’t it weird like—like I felt like—like _I’d known him before_ kind of cliche, how familiar everything—“ Dean stopped as he met Sam’s alarmed gaze. “I mean, I felt I’d known him forever but—“

 

Sam stared at him like he’d grown daisies out of his nose. “That’s your ‘ _You're a kinda whipped vibe’_ , Dean.”

 

Dean took a swig of his beer, “I’m telling you, man everything’s kinda fast vibe. “ He stopped and distractedly scratched the label on the bottle.

 

“And you’re afraid.”

 

Dean met Sam’s gaze, “Just don’t bring back Lisa or I swear I’ll break your nose.” Sam clamped his mouth shut. He sighs, battling internally his feelings that keep on reeling.

 

“Just hold it right there, Dean. Cas is different from her—I mean, take a look at you now you’re..you.”

 

“You’re fangirling on Cas and no, we’re on a deadly chase. Time is running out like water.”

 

“That’s the point, instead of worrying and moping why not give yourselves a treat.”

 

Dean’s brow raised to his hairline, beer hovered near his lips. “I don’t swing that way—“

 

“Sure, if that makes you sleep at night and throwing eye sex with the guy counted as manly.” Sam said while typing on his phone.

 

Now Dean put down his beer on the table, braced himself to jibe or possibly deny. “You misunderstood everything –“

 

Cas arrived with a bag of take-outs on hand. Dean’s eyes widened in surprise and throw a glare at Sam whose smirking, waved his phone mockingly.

 

“Hello, Dean.” Cas said solemnly, lingered looks straight to Dean’s eyes.

 

Dean melted, metaphorically and smiled goofily. “Hey, Cas.”

 

And Cas acknowledged Sam tearing his eyes off away from Dean. He put down the bags on the table. “Hello, Sam. I hope I didn’t bother you—“

 

Dean chuckled but Sam cut him off, “No, Cas because I’m back and—Oh, hey now I remember.” Dean can see the light bulb above Sam’s head lit up as he turned to them. “Are you free on Thursday? Like 8 PM, Thursday?”

 

Dean hesitantly said, “Y-Yeah?”

 

Then Sam turned to Cas, “How about you, Cas?”

 

Cas shrugged, “Yes, it’s my day off.”

 

Dean narrowed his eyes suspiciously at Sam and his brother beamed ear to ear suddenly, clapped his hands loudly. And the light bulb above Sam’s head shone brighter than a billion suns.“Great!” He licked his lips, “Because I’m not. You two go on a date!”

 

Dean and Cas blinked as realization dawned and seeped into their brains.

 

Sam stood up calmly with his crutches. “I’m gonna get some beer.” And he left.

 

“Did he just..”Dean didn’t miss Sam’s giggle as his gigantic form hunched inside the opened fridge.

 

“We kissed so why not?” Cas said calm but clipped and sat beside Dean, rummaging the take-out boxes and passed one to Dean.

 

Dean accepted it and give the take-out salad a stink eye. But Sam heard his dark evil plan and shouted. “Don’t you dare bitch on my take-out, Dean! Don’t even lay a single finger on it!”

 

“Sure, after what you did!” Dean shouted back as he opened the box and attacked the Chinese spring roll with a stab on his chopstick. “A date.” He muttered grimly.

 

“Yes.” Cas replied munching on his own food.

 

“So that means—you know what that means right?”

 

“Yes.” Cas deadpanned.

 

Dean cleared his throat and chuckled drily, “You know, um—“

 

Cas sigh, defeated. “It’s alright if you’re not into this..”

 

Dean bit his lip and faced Cas to snap but he’s met with one of his begging, hurt puppy eyes so he cursed internally instead. “This isn’t fair.” He huffed, “This is new to me, Cas.”

 

“Don’t stress yourself. You’re not alone in that crisis of yours. We can still be straight.”

 

“But gay for each other.” Dean snorted.

 

But Cas stared at him hard that made him squirmed a bit. “But just so you know I really—Ireallywanttoknowyou, Dean.”

 

Dean nearly choked, cheeks beet red as Cas continued on his stammered words and unexpected confession.

 

“Share every moment with you... I-I really like you, Dean.” And Dean also noticed Cas’ flushed cheeks and neck. His fingers tapped distractedly on his lap then twirled the chopsticks and goes back on tapping his lap. “And that includes your sassiness and the way how you pissed me—I mean—I never felt this way so strong that I can’t control it. Like as if you’re a beacon of light and...everything’s familiar about you.”

 

Dean bit his lower lip and can’t help but smiled. “You’re something, you know that?” Cas held his gaze while his stomach does the somersault. “Since when?..” He asked tentatively.

 

Cas looked down and scratched the back of his neck. “Maybe the first time I met you—But then  after what happened to Alfie—It’s not your fault, Dean and I apologize for what I said to you.” He huffed in frustration and cheeks beet red. “I-I don’t really know when—this is awkward.”

 

Before Cas goes on on his ramblings, Dean leaned into him and captured his lips gently. Geez, the fluttering did a triple wave because Cas nuzzled their noses together. That weird, sappy, sweet kind of gesture made Dean smile.

 

He inhaled Cas’ pine and fresh cut grass scent. Cas leaned away, raised his hand and tapped the tip of Dean’s nose gently, three times like a secret code or something. And Dean swore Cas’ eyes twinkled and there’s his smile again. If his heart had hands it’ll clap like a seal in happiness and beat the shit out of him if he still denied how he felt right now.

 

“That settles then. Thursday 8 PM. No turning back.” Dean said sternly.

“Right. Let’s face this like two grown-ass men.”

 

They stared into each other’s eyes, determined face. But Dean can’t hold his laugh of how gross and sappy they are. Cas joined him with his hearty laugh and adorable scrunched up nose. Their laughs mingled and turned into smiles, sweet smiles but before it’ll turn into a make out session, the moose simply interrupted.

 

Sam picked up his salad and Dean wondered how he tiptoed silently with his heavy cast and crutches. He sat on the other single couch, munching happily on his rabbit food. “It’s good to be home.” He smiled widely and Dean’s not oblivious to the meaning of that exaggerated smile of his moose of a brother.

 

They watched a football game on TV and Sam and Dean throwing jibes back and forth and cheering their teams. While Cas just watched them in amusement. When Dean accidentally let go of his chopsticks as he throw a fist pump in the air when his team scored; without hesitation, using his chopstick, Cas feed him.

 

Sam nearly choke as Dean opened his mouth, chewed the green leafy thing without a beat and continued cheering like a fan girl. “Not swinging that way, my ass.” He smirked and Dean ignored it.

 

Dean beamed ear to ear not because his team scored but Sam accepted his new taste. Well, in the first place Sam’s the one who’d seen the other side of him. Nice, now Sam’s setting him up which is nicer.

 

A fog slowly crept on the window glass, swirled until it formed a word that Dean reminded him that any moment Cas’ life will be taken. Panic and worry rise up inside him and he held Cas’ hand that can’t be seen from Sam’s prying eyes. He squeezed it gently and watched Cas’ face, memorizing every line of that gorgeous face.

 

Shit. He won’t let Death ruin his first date with Cas. He felt a gentle squeeze on his hand and Cas met his eyes.

 


	4. Chapter 4

 

 

_Darkness._

_Endless darkness._

_Ripped, tormented voices crying out of pain. Rotten, burned flesh and blood wafted that made Dean’s stomach churned in disgust. Yet, he struggled both wrists and lashed out but the large stained, rusted hooks, pulled every inch of his skin._

_He shouted, “Saaaamyyy!!! Help me!!!”_

_The cries got louder beyond the darkness and muffled his voice. A struck of lightning nearly hit and scrape his body hanged upside-down among the chains. “Somebody help me, please!”_

_He shut his eyes and when he opened it, he can’t move a single inch. But his limbs no longer tied and hooked by the chains. He sucked out for air and fumbled anything in his pockets only to retrieve a lighter.He flicked the light off and he gasped for air upon realizing he’s inside a coffin. His own coffin. He coughed and shut his eyes._

_Once he opened his eyes by a loud sudden bang, a searing hot pain shot through his left arm and found himself back inside the barn. Light bulbs flickered and shattered. A man wearing a tan trench coat stood in front of him. A familiar coat. Yet he can’t distinguish the man’s face when he looked up. Only blurred and obscured face he can see._

_“Who are you?” He asked, glared daggers onto the man stood in front of him right after he poked Bobby with two fingers and send the old man unconscious sprawled on the ground._

_The man’s blurred face turned to him, “I’m the one who gripped you tight and raised you from perdition.” Hearing those familiar gravel voice made Dean aware that somehow this isn’t a dream._

_He remembered this. It happened right after...It’s a memory._

A loud bang shook Dean and bolted awake, panting, chest heaving, eyes widened. He sat on his bed for a few calming breaths before he stood up and retrieve a whiskey on the kitchen, stashed and hidden one of the cupboards.

The searing pain on his left arm made him clutched it as he watched the lightning of thunder from his window. He took a swig and rubbed his eyes wearily with the back of his palm. Another clap of thunder crashed that made the ground vibrated.

Dean flinched, coughed as the whiskey ran through his nostrils when the wall clock alarmed. The time announcing a deadline. He glanced up at the clock and smoldered it. Then glanced at the window, took a glimpse of Cas’ creepy house.

The post’s lights stood beside the street keeps flickering. And his eyes grew wider as he saw his car on Cas’ driveway, again. He whipped back, eyes started on the coffee table where the keys fully intact and mocking him in _What the hell, dude?_

“Fuck.” He turned back his attention on his car, “Why are you always running in there?” He whispered, disbelieving as he moved away from the window.

Slumping back down on the couch, he fished out the bottle of whiskey and took a long swig. But he started and nearly sputtered when his phone blared, breaking the silence and his thoughts. Wiping out the dreads of whiskey off his chin with his hand, he took his phone, swallowed nervously upon reading the printed name on the screen.

Bobby’s gruff voice greeted him. “You took the car again.”

Dean ran a hand through his hair, “Yup.” He lied shame.

“Somethin’ wrong goin’ on, boy. I can smell it here.”

Dean chuckled and sounded fake, “ Thanks for your concern and sense of smell, Bobby but uhh I’m good. I’ll return her tomorrow.”

He heard Bobby let out a deep sigh and he can imagine the old man’s eye roll. “I’ll see ya, tomorrow.” Then he hung up.

Dean tossed his phone on the couch, glanced back at his car still intact and shining under the light-post. “That’s it.”

And therefore, he decided and cleaned the bathroom, kitchen, and even Sam’s messy room. He didn’t stop until exhaustion sunk down into his bones and muscles and the things bothered him faded. Once done and satisfied, he took a glimpse hesitantly back at the window.

But he started and stumbled by Cas stood outside. “Fuck! Cas, you did this on purpose!” And felt stupid again upon realizing that Cas can’t hear him through the closed window as the guy’s furrowed brows and head tilt™ showed.

Huffing, he yanked the window open. “What.” He didn’t mean to sound annoyed. But his pissed mode changed to curious as his attention zapped on Cas’ tan trench-coat.

“Your car, Dean.”Cas sighed but matched with his smity glare that made Dean turned on—

Dean cleared his throat and cut off his oncoming sexual fantasy before it reached Cas’ via freaky mind reading power. “Yeah, that.” He didn’t know where to put his hands so he decided upon leaning awkwardly on the window pane with his elbow. And avoided Cas’ intense stare as he added gruffly, “Another supernatural thing happened. Again.”

They just stared each other until Dean broke it out with an embarrassing, loud grumble of his stomach. Too much way of announcing his body yearned for food now. “Gonna get some grub and join me?”

Cas shrugged and inclined his head in a gesture of _Let’s go, then._

 

Dean drove the Impala with Cas riding shotgun. They bantered again because Cas turned down the volume of Dean’s classic rock music. They ended up slapping each other's hand away from the dial of the radio. Dean swerved on the left when Cas slapped his hand away, hard. He nearly slapped back but then laughed as Cas sneezed and nearly bumped his nose on the dashboard.

Cas sniffed and glared daggers at him. Yet, there’s a small tug on the corners of his mouth and Dean can’t ignore that tiny smile for his insides flipped and did a somersault again. They ended up at the nearest diner and took a spot near the window where the shore’s view is clear.

Dean blushed like a freakin’ high school girl complete with pigtails and pimples as he remembered their first kiss. He distracted himself by ravishing the double cheeseburger. This is real food.

Cas who sat across the table, enjoyed his pasta, fries, mashed potato and dark coffee. Dean hid his amusement and suppressed his mouth to comment how he influenced and ruined Cas’ healthy choice of food.

“Is this a start of our manly date?” Dean said jokingly, leaned his elbows on the table.

But his goofy vibe was been cut off by Cas’ stern stare. “I was afraid and worried of what happened to you last night because I felt your fear and anxiety.”

_He felt it now._ Dean's not surprised by that, “Blame my freaking nightmares.”

Cas nodded, absently smeared a smudge of tomato sauce from his pasta on the corner of his mouth.

Dean rolled his eyes of how cliche this is, “Cas, you’ve got something in your mouth and please don’t make me wipe that out.” He said playfully wagging his brows.

Cas met his eyes and used his finger and wiped off the sauce and sucked it directly on his mouth. Dean froze in his seat and the bastard smirked. He averted his eyes on the hideous poster of Justin Bieber on the left corner of the wall.

Squeezing his legs together as his groin twitched in attention to Cas’ soft moaning sounds, making out with his food. His slender, long, piano elegant fingers obscenely make its way to his sinful lips—Right, he did this on purpose. Cas is way more dangerous on his revenge than Sam.

Thankfully, Cas’ phone blared on it’s _Macarena_ ringtone. His libido died down and stared at Cas like he’d grown a pair of antlers on his ears. “What? I didn’t have any other music saved on my phone.”

“Really, Cas? And you’re bitching on mine? Dude, seriously you’ve got a lot to learn on picking out a decent ringtone.” Dean mocked him playfully.

“And it doesn’t have to include your kind of music.” Cas retorted back before Dean had the opportunity on throwing his lines, he answered his phone.

Dean shook his head, smiling amused, “You really are something.”

 

 

 

 

Dean dropped Cas at the convenient store where (as Cas stated) he worked as a salesclerk undercover. The owner, Nora, had known Cas’ father and owed a debt. She let Cas worked and prevented the paparazzi’s tailing him on those moments. Cas was thankful and grateful to her.

He watched Cas trudged towards the door. But out of nowhere the _Macarena_ song blared out and he cursed upon noticing Cas’ phone on the seat he had abandoned. He fished it and silenced the mocking ringtone. He got outside the car when he noticed a little girl with blonde hair talking to Cas.

It’s a kid and maybe Death would not use an innocent kid for killing Cas. And his doubts and speculations were the ones died for the kid handed two different flowers to Cas, a white heliotrope and yellow yarrow. Heh, blame Sammy’s geographical channel on why he’s familiar with it.

Cas smiled adoringly at the little girl, “Thank you, Claire.”

Claire smiled back as she did a sign language on her hands. Dean furrowed his brow and watched in fascination on the little girl’s hand moved swiftly on the air.

“Okay.” Cas replied. But Claire sternly replied, like jabbing the air now in a kind of way as she signed. Cas worried his bottom lip and a tinged of pink blossomed on his cheeks. Wow, that’s cute and—

Claire, however, rolled her eyes and wrote something on her _magic slate_. She showed it to Cas and the words scribbled clearly in angry strokes.

 

 

 

Then she tapped the tip of Cas’ nose, three times.

“Okay, I will.” Cas raised his left hand and do the scout’s honor solemnly.

But Dean’s eyes widened as everything clicked on his snail-paced turning brain. He remembered clear as the day when Cas did that nose tapping stuff to him yesterday. He watched Claire waved goodbye, trudged along with a bunch of kids towards a school bus parked nearby the store.

Dean plan on running back on his car but Cas turned when his phone did the _Macarena_ thing. Cas stood there, eyes widened like a deer caught in headlights and hid the flowers behind. He swallowed nervously, “Dean. You forget something?”

Dean met Cas’ widened eyes and shook the phone he’s holding and handed it to Cas and eyed the guy suspiciously. “She’s cute and sassy. Kind of familiar, huh?”

Cas licked his lips, “Her parents got murdered and I handled the case 4 years ago. It’s the reason of why until now she can’t talk.” There’s a glint of sadness in his eyes as he stared on Claire inside the bus.

“Coulda hard for her.”

Cas nodded and body tensed as Dean eyed him suspiciously.

“I guess that’s for me?”

Cas froze and scratched his nape nervously, “Uhm—yeah.” He handed the flowers to Dean hesitantly.

Dean accepted it and automatically smelled it. “Geez, I’m starting to grow some lady parts now.” He chuckled and winked at Cas.

“You’re welcome. We can braid each other’s hair later.” Cas said playfully. That playful smirk plastered on his face that Dean wants to wipe it with a kiss since that smirk offendedly showed the first time.

So, what’s stopping him now? He pulled Cas’ lapels, cupping his face and peppered him with kisses all over his face. Cas laughed and kissed him back. As he closed his eyes, capturing Cas’ lips passionately, a sudden flash of images warped through his senses.

_He’s inside a dank, moldy walled basement, wrapped and etched with foreign characters and seals. He saw himself bloody, wrists cuffed in shackles, hanged up in chains. He heard a groan on is left side and caught a glimpse of a tan trench-coat obscured by the lit candles illuminating the darkness of the basement. He can’t quite tell if its blood soaking the coat or just the shadows made by the lit candles._

_He wants to reach Cas but he can’t move a muscle from where he stood. There’s a trail of black feathers beneath his feet. The rest of it ended where Cas located, hidden beyond the shadow._

A jolt of pain snatched him back to reality. He blinked as Cas watched him worriedly, hands held tight on his shoulders. “Dean, What’s wrong?”

Dean’s internally battling himself upon his vision's meaning. It obviously pointed as a warning, a trap. And he saw the scenario that Cas will save him and that’s where Death flicked its fingers, snapped Cas’ life out. No—

His lips quivered as Cas rubbed gentled circles with his thumb on his cheek. Cas’ eyes round and full of questions and worry. He resisted his tears and the strong emotions of anytime he’ll lose Cas.

Dean swallowed and forced himself to smile. “Cas, we’re gonna get through this together. I won’t let this stuff destroy my plans of taking you on a date—dates. One hundred dates, man.” He nuzzled on the crook of Cas’ neck, hiding the tears escaped.

“I don’t want this to be our last, Dean.”

 

 

 

 

 Thursday.

Tha day has finally come.

Dean woke up with a beaming smile and yep, Sam never wavered and teased him until he hauled up his ass on his car. He goes back to Singer’s Auto-shop and the guys welcomed him with confetti and 101 questions about _the guy he’s into._ The source mainly Jo _(who got from Sam)_ who won’t shut up until he blurted out Cas’ powerful name.

And that’s a wrong move there, for all they know Castiel Novak was a legend (according to Kevin),  a hot lawyer (from Ash who Jo agreed incredulously but earning Ash a raised brow from Kevin). They’re all giddy and excited to meet Cas and because of that Dean’s thankful because Bobby aborted their _we need to talk_ appointment. Bobby just gives him one of those gruff comment too.

“So that’s why you’re all blooming now and taking her out.” Bobby gestured to the car and tapped Dean’s  shoulder and added, “What’re you, fifteen? You can’t just hide him from me, boy. Wanna meet him too.”

The three psychos agreed as they left Dean and goes to their respective job.

However, Dean’s eyes widened, staring at Bobby’s retreating back. He expected the opposite reaction as he comes out unexpectedly. “Wow, am I that obvious?” He muttered a smile plastered on his face as he fiddled the tool box.

Feeling like dancing, he goes on working the beat up Toyota wearing a smile the whole day. And with his good mood, he fixed the car in time as the owner checked on the car’s condition. Whistling his way to the washroom, he checked the time for the manly date is going to happen tonight. No, he’s not fifteen anymore.

Kicking the _kilig_ feelings aside, he scrubbed the remnants of oil grease stuck on his nails but he stopped when the lights flickered. He froze and all the happy feels wipe out in a blink of an eye. His heart starts to hammer fast as he gathered his phone.

He called Sam and thankfully the moose was with Ellen right now along with Jody. He sighs in relief but Sam reminded him about Cas. Cursing, he called Cas’ phone. It rang many times and his panic rises.

“C’mon, Cas. Pick it up—“

“Hello, Dean.”

“Cas, you okay? Where are you right now?” Dean trudged out the washroom and beelines to the door.

“I’m on my way there because there’s something I want to tell you personally—wait, Dean, what’s going on?” Cas sounded worried all because he felt Dean’s uneasiness.

Dean hopped inside the car and apologetically waved Bobby who shot him a confused look. “Listen, just don’t drive. Park your in a safe place and stay where you are, okay? I’m gonna get you there—“

“Dean, will you please tell me what’s going on?”

Dean reeled the car, swallowed because all of a sudden his throat becomes dry. He tightened his grip on the steering wheel and drive. “The sign is—the sign is showing—“ He bit his knuckles as his voice shook, “The bitch is coming to get you now, Cas and I’m not gonna let that happen.” He pushed the pedal, clenched his teeth and welled up the tears stung on the rim of his eyes.

There’s silence on the other line before he heard Cas’ breathing, “I understand. I’ll just wait here then.” Cas replied calmly and Dean’s a shitons of afraid.

“Cas, I—“ Dean stuttered and punched himself mentally in the face. No, he wants to tell him face to face because he doesn’t want this to be a goodbye. “I’m on my way, Cas.”

As Dean speed up the Impala, he caught a glimpse of a shadow stood in the middle of the road. The shadow turned static, warped and formed a human face he recognized, Lucifer. Before he crashes on it, the shadow vanished into thin air and only its black tendrils of smoke scattered into the wind were the evidence left.

How the hell did Lucifer get in here? Wait. And why did he know all about this?! He winced as another wave of pain shot through his head. Flashes of blurred images overlapped each other in front of his eyes. He nearly crashes on the car ahead of him if he didn’t slam the brake. Cursing but thankful for his adrenaline rush and took a few deep calming breaths.

“Take it easy. You can do this. You can save him this time.”

When he reached the long traffic on the intersection highway, he caught Cas’ car parked beside the road under the cottonwood tree. Cas sat inside, tapped his finger impatiently on the steering wheel, brows furrowed, eyes searching for every car on the road.

Dean sigh in relief as Cas saw him. The crease of deep concentration on his brows faded and replaced with a smile. Cas waved his hand at him and he waved back returning the smile. And boy, he wants to run over there and protect Cas with his embrace. But lucky him, he got caught in the red light which is now mocked his temper.

There’s a nagging off feeling that something in this scenario isn’t right. Everything since this morning is way too perfect and that’s screaming different kinds of danger zone ahead. Added up the death sign. Dean heard a distant screeching of tires against the asphalt road and a roar of truck’s engine.

Curious, he peered outside the window, craned his neck where the noise came. He noticed that he’s not the only one hearing the noise of the few people on the sidewalk craned their necks across the other road. Worry etched on their faces and Dean heard a faint _It’s coming towards the school bus!_

Dean hastily yanked the door open and glanced at the other side of the road. Cas’ car still whole and fully intact. But he stopped dead in his tracks as he met Cas’ eyes. There’s sadness in his eyes and that’s where realization hits him.

Because it wasn’t just a truck but a god damn ten wheeler truck again fastly approaching towards the school bus halted. The kids currently on their line towards the nearest t bakeshop. Oblivious by the blaring honk of the truck.

Dean’s eyes widened, feet glued to the ground. “No..” His voice barely an audible whisper but strained his foot and ran. Ignoring how shaky his legs become. “Cas!” His voice finally came out hoarse but Cas’ attention zeroed on the school bus. “Caaas!” He nearly hit by a car as he crosses the street.

Cas’ car moved and stopped in the middle of the road. A loud crash boomed as the ten wheeler truck hit directly on Cas’ car. Dean stopped breathing as he watched Cas’ car tumbled many times until it crashed on one of the stores. While the truck swerved away from the school bus and instead directly crashed on the trunk of a cottonwood tree.

It’s rear quashed and the engine died down with a hiss. Smoke starts coming out on its hood. Dean stood there and the utter words of few people witnessed the accident muffled in silence as he saw Cas’ unconscious form, lying on his side, right limp hand covered in blood.

_‘Knowing you, it..it’s been the best part of my life. And the things that..the things we’ve shared together, they have changed me.You’re my family. I love you.’_

A cry of Cas’ name brought back his senses to reality. It was coming from one of the kids on the school bus. A familiar little girl with blonde hair. Claire. Dean bit the inside of his cheek and fought the numbness in every bit of his flesh and ran towards Cas.

He stepped shards of broken glass scattered near the broken, deformed car and Cas lying beside it. He crouched down and slowly held Cas into his arms. The trench-coat he used to like now drenched in blood. He swallowed his sob and gently lie Cas on his back, head rested on his lap.

Cas’ face smeared in crimson blood, tiny shards of broken glass cut and stuck on the left side of his cheek. A gaping long, deep gash cut across his forehead. Warm blood seeped down and trailed down the side of his face. And Cas right arm twisted in wrong way.

Dean numbly and slowly plucked the broken glass stuck on Cas’ split bloody lips. His hand trembled when Cas whimpered in pain. “Ssshhh, it’s okay. I’m here. I got you, Cas.”

Cas let out a broken sob, eyes half open and his cerulean eyes begin to dull. He coughed and spluttered blood. Dean leaned their foreheads together gently as tears streamed down from his eyes. As if transferring his strength to Cas, the half of his life but fuck—he can’t even stop Cas’ pain, can’t even—

Whispered pleas came out from his trembling lips. “ _Please, stay with me. Don’t you dare die, Cas! This is going to be our first date. I’ll never forgive you if you die on me now”_

Dean clenched his teeth, “And there’s still ninety-nine dates we’ve got to work. You have to meet Bobby, Ellen and—those guys were excited to meet you. And I’m going to say, _This blue-eyed cutie-patootie is mine._ We’re gonna get through this, right Cas? We’re gonna get through this. And after that you’re going to live with me—“ He chuckled and sniffed as more tears escape from his eyes. “We’ll have some awesome gay sex—Hell, you haven’t tasted my home baked pie. You better—“ He cried, kissed Cas’ temple and whispered, “Please, don’t...”

He noticed Cas’ finger twitched a tad bit. Dean watched Cas struggled as he slowly lifts his hand and covered Dean’s hand holding his face. Dean looked at him, tears streamed down his eyes as Cas opened his lips and gasped. Cas’ lips trembled as he glided his hand and tapped the tip of Dean’s nose, slowly, three times. A tear falls down from his eyes and Dean’s heart broke into pieces.

Dean sobbed. “Cas..” He gently swiped his thumb on Cas’ right cheek, met his fading deep ocean eyes that any second will be gone. He croaked out hoarsely, “I love you, too.” He swallowed and uttered the words clearly without any fear and hesitation. “I love you.”

Cas let out a final breath and slowly close his eyes. His hand turned limped and dropped down on his side.

“I love you, Cas. Cas—“ Dean sobbed and held Cas tightly in his arms. “I love you.”

Thursday. That’s  the day Cas knocked on his door. And it’s the same day he kissed him the first time. It’s the same day Cas died in his arms.

 

 

 

 

Dean clutched the trenchcoat, now rough and stiff with dried blood, Cas’ blood. He ignored the few passers-by giving him worried and pity looks. Five minutes ago, the doctor declared Cas died in the road accident before he’s hauled up in the ambulance. Too late to survive him back.

No one claimed Cas’ body. No one cried. Nobody asked why did it happen to him. No one gives a shit that someone died today sacrificing himself.

Dean just sat there on the bare white floor of the hospital, back rested on the wall. The hallway’s noise dissipated as he stared blankly on the other side of the wall. Remnants of Cas’ blood smeared and dried on his forehead, shirt, and hands. He didn’t know how much time passed and ignored the phone calls and texts from his family and friends.

Somebody stopped beside him and held his shoulder, clamped with those giant hands and grounding him back. “Dean, let’s get you home.” Came Sam’s gentle voice above him.

“I can’t leave him. I won’t leave him alone, Sam.” Dean said calmly as he looked up to Sam and regretted meeting those pitiful look. He looked away from Sam and stared back at the wall. “He’ll wake up without me.”

Sam took a deep sigh, “That’s the seventh time you told me. Dean, listen—“

“Sam.” Dean gritted out, warning evidently on his voice, knuckles white clutching the coat in his arms. He bit the inside of his cheek as he suppressed the tears stung on the rim of his eyes.

Sam, however not aware of Dean’s dilemma and bit back as he shuffled closer to Dean. Crutches hit the tip of Dean’s boot. “Dean, we need to brace ourselves.”

Dean swallowed the bile, breath stuttered. He doesn’t dare look up to Sam because if he did.. “Why?” _Why it had to be him? Why can’t I even save him?_

“Because it’s real.”

Dean didn’t know how he broke apart, sobbing in his brother’s arms. It came in a rush that it overwhelmed him. He can’t stop it now. The reality strikes back hard and he’s drowning. He sobbed, crying Cas’ name. Asking of _why it happen to him_ , _why he didn’t save him._ _Why is it that nobody cares?_ Oh yeah, because somehow for all those times he asked the same questions when his parents died.

No one answered. No one’s listening.

He didn’t notice how he ended up on the backseat of the car. Ash the one driving and throwing glances at him while Sam riding shotgun. He wedged the trench-coat between the side of his face and the window, making it a pillow.

Cas’ pine, fresh cut grass and the iron smell of blood lulled him to sleep with tears in his eyes. The heliotrope and yarrow start to wither as it greeted him when they got home. He didn’t sleep on his bed that night but instead on the couch near the window where he can glance at Cas’ house from afar. Three beers and a bottle of whiskey didn’t knock him out but only worsen his state of longing and emptiness.

The next day, he goes to work like he used to. Greeting his friends with his usual bravado and thankfully they let him act. He didn’t care the pity looks they gave him. They’re aware and know the man behind the mask he wore.  So, they keep their distance away and mouth shut.

As he passes Cas’ house, he wondered if he should check inside and maybe Cas was alright and alive. That all happened yesterday was just one of his nightmares. But Cas’ wrecked, totaled car parked in the garage is enough evidence that his nightmare came true.

 

 

 

 

Dean got home late from spending his time in the pub and drowned his thoughts and pain with booze. Even though he knows the numb effect wouldn’t last long and wipe all his misery. The world will still keep on turning while he’s busy mourning.

He even stopped in the middle of the road, punched the steering wheel hard until he felt his knuckles stung, voice hoarse from shouting curse words and to whoever listening above the cloud nine.  As he reached his house without any further damage to his drunken state, an unexpected guest met him on his porch.

Gabriel accidentally hit Dean’s shoe with the tip of his cane as he waved it and tapped the ground. “Oh, apologies, Dean-o.” But Dean knows he did it on purpose.

He beckoned the guy inside. Offered him a beer because he didn’t even bother that he’s out of stock, officially food. They sat silently on the couch, lost in each other’s thoughts. Until Gabriel broke the silence between them with a fake hideous cough.

“I can’t blame you or Cas or..” Gabriel sigh in defeat. “It’s bound to happen. You interfered on that moment where you saved Cas’ life inside the elevator, so Death was targeting your back instead. But Cas did the same thing and..” He chuckled, “I was shocked by the sudden turn of events.”

Dean stared blankly at the table as he took a long swig of his beer and clutched it with inevitable grip. “This isn’t over.”

“I know and you better use that—“ Gabriel pointed Dean’s chest, “—this time. After all, death is not the end.” He put his hat back on his head as he stood and finished gulping the beer. Then he put the empty can on the table and grabbed his cane leaned on the side of the couch. “Well, that’s all. Thanks for the beer, wasting your time for the longest chat with me and you should fix that wall clock.”

Dean looked at him bored, furrowed his brow as he glanced back at the wall clock beside him. And surely it is, its hand didn’t move. He turned back to Gabe and ignored the weird feeling every time he stared at the creepy clock.

“And thanks to all the way for dropping by.” He said awkwardly as he walked Gabe outside.

“It stopped since Cas lost his final breath, I guess. Five times you saw him died on the other side of reality, the ‘ _same verse_ ’.” Gabriel does the air quotes that reminds Dean with a pang of Cas. “Well, the fifth one was mouth gaping kind of shock and unexpected just like what happened now.” He pursed his lips and added, “The sixth one happened here but you know the higher ups is giving you a chance. So, don’t just mope here, amigo. Your trip to different kinds of an alternate reality will start in a moment. Just a tad of advice, don’t hold back.” Gabriel grinned as he dramatically tipped the bill of his hat and just like that, he vanished in a blink of an eye.

Dean stood numbly and doesn’t know if he should freak out or care to freak out after all the shits he’d been through. He doesn’t have a single clue what the hell Gabriel talked about before he pulled out that magic stunt.

 

The next day, Sam met the coroner and sadly announced that Cas have the chance to survive if only his three broken ribs didn’t puncture his lungs and lost a lot of blood. But there’s a higher risk of coma due to a blood clot on the right side of his brain.

And Dean had too much to hear those words. Sam handed him a note. “Cas dropped this note on me before the accident. He seemed in a hurry so I didn’t care to ask if..”

Dean took a swig straight from the bottle of whiskey and ignored Sam as his brother let out a long suffering sigh and put the note on the table. “You know, Dean I-I’m always here for you, man. If you want to talk about it.” He eyed tersely on the bottle of whiskey on Dean’s hand before he walked away and left Dean with his emotions drowning him.

Dean stared at the note. Cas’ clumsy writing scribbled on it.

 

 

He stared at it for a few long minutes until he remembered Gabriel’s other side of reality. Flashes of his dreams about the trench coat man snapped his attention back. Those lines.

_‘A part of me always believed that you would come back.’_

“Cas...” He gasped, eyes widened, clutched the note to his chest. Heavy tears streamed down from his eyes as a whacked sob escaped his mouth. He can’t control it. It hurt so much like the part of himself was lashed out and it left an empty burning hole, slowly killing the other side and part of him. He clawed on his chest because the searing pain got stronger.

_‘Who are you?’_

_‘Castiel.’_

_‘Yeah, I figured that much. I mean what are you?’_

_‘I’m an angel of the Lord. I’m the one who gripped you tight and raised you from perdition.’_

It wasn’t a nightmare.

 

He stood up abruptly and ignored the pain as he glanced at the window where Cas’ gloomy house can be seen. A twisted pain shot through his chest again but he tolerated it and walked briskly outside the house. Footsteps dragged heavily as he stepped outside while Sam’s alerted by his sudden moves and followed him with no words towards Cas’ house.

But before he got inside, Sam held his shoulder and stopped him with his moose strength. “Dean, what the hell’s going on?” The concern and fear evident on his face and eyebrows as they twitched.

“I need you to use your research power.” Dean grounded out sternly.

This time, Sam’s eyebrows rose to his hairline passed the wifi like lines on his forehead. “Care to elaborate?”

“Cas’ family.”

Sam’s brow furrowed, “ You know they’re all dead, man—“

“9.18.8. That’s 18th of September where Cas and I met in a ..barn in—in a dramatic way. Those nightmares they’re not—“ He ran his hand through his hair and down his face. “Fuck, those were memories of mine.” He bit his nail nervously. “There’s gotta be a hole to this shitons—“

But of course, Sam cut off his _‘close to panic’_ state as he said complete with worry puppy eyes. “Dean, I’m worried here.”

“Remember the other alternate reality thing that dick Gabriel mentioned?” Sam just waited dumbly for him to continue. “Well, surprise because this whole thing here is not real. And oh, that Gabe is more a psycho psychic that disappear after uttering a dramatic line.”

Sam just stared at him like he’d grown a shark head wearing a grass skirt or probably processing the words he said as he himself didn’t even get what he’d blabbered. “Man, that’s—“

Dean turned grim and glared daggers at Sam, “If you’re gonna say schizophrenia, I swear to whoever eavesdropping up there to put all the kinds of porn on your precious laptop, Sammy.”

Instead of scared, Sam looked offended, “Hey, I was goin’ to ask how did you know.” He shook his head. “ Overthinker jerk.”

Dean rolled his eyes, “Cas’ door, bitch. Go on, scan it with your x-ray eyeballs.”

Sam, the younger that he is, stared at the door with a weary expression on his face. He stared at it for a few minutes. “Then what—“ The door glitched and his eyes widened and stepped away. “Holy sh—“

“Then try to look around you.” Dean said smugly.

Sam’s eyes grew wide like saucers as Cas house glitched continuously. “Fuck. How—how—did—“ He turned  to Dean face contorted with mixed emotions, “Since when did you notice this—“

“Just now.”

Sam stared at him unbelievably, “So this means—this..” He twirled his finger in the air. “I’m not real.” He said vaguely.

Dean swallowed, “Yeah.”

And Sam added hesitantly, “And Cas is alive.”

Dean looked down, “I don’t have a clue about that.” The pain strikes back on his head. He winced and took a sharp breath as silence engulfed between them.

Sam’s face sober and clapped Dean’s shoulder, “That note explains everything. And I think Cas remembered..”

“Yeah, he didn’t have the chance to tell it to me because y’know, he—“ Dean can’t even finish as his throat locked up.

Sam’s determination face leveled up, “We’re gonna find the culprit behind this.” And yeah, marked his brother’s word for It’ll come true right before you knew.

“Thanks, man. You’re always the brother with a girls mane that I ever have.”

“Jerk.”

“Bitch.”

“Thank me when we fix this.”

 

 

 

 

They received a message from the coroner; a friend of Jody, that somebody claimed Cas’ body. A woman under the name of Naomi Tapping. Sam, having a genius friend was an advantage of searching suspicious people despite being religious but involved in two cases of corruption, smuggling, and attempted murder.

“This must be the obvious _it,_ Sam.” Dean announced eagerly and turned to Sam with hope and determination blazed in his eyes.

Sam give him an encouraging nod and continued typing on his laptop. “Oh, she’s one of that far relative of Shurley. And get this, she ran a psych ward center in Chicago but it shut down after Chuck’s  disappearance. And just opened recently a spa in California with his second husband Zachariah.” He checked a mail from Queen of Moondoor.” Charlie sends me the address where Naomi currently resides in..” He blinked in astonishment. “Huh. Florida.”

Dean leaned back in his seat and rested his head, gazed up the ceiling. “Oh, that’s nice. Is that even close to your firm?”

“Nope, for a person like her staying in the state was a mistake and—Oh, Dean.” Sam’s voice turned rigid that Dean bolted up on his seat.

“What?” Dean alarmed, leaned close on the screen as Sam scrolled down. His eyes widened when he caught a familiar face. Young Castiel under one of the listed patients admitted to the said psych ward center. “Fuck.” Different kinds of worst scenario played inside his head. Knowing the few records from this Naomi made his blood boil.

“We need to find this out. Now.” And Sam’s persistence now on full throttle.

Dean nodded but worried his bottom lip, “What, we’re going to fly to Florida?” Sam shrugged. “As in right now? Ride a freaking piece of flying metal?!”

Sam rolled his eyes upon Dean’s poor but exaggerated description of an aircraft. “That would take us 19 hours and 58 minutes via I-75 S—“ Dean shook his head stubbornly, eyes wide in panic. Sam sigh in defeat, “Fine, you drive.”

“Dean grinned, “Of course, I’ll drive. You need your beauty sleep.”

“Says the person who looks like shit and smelled weed.” Sam retorted back as he retreated to the guest room.

“Hey!” Dean sniffed his armpit and scrunched up his face in disgust. “Seriously, Sam you need to cut your hair. It unleashed your inner woman.” He mumbled while dumping some extra shirts on his duffel bag.

He flinched when Sam emerged from the door fully dressed in his usual plaid wardrobe outfit. “Dean, whatever this is..I’m on board.” Dean looked up to Sam, sincerity evident in his hazel eyes. “Cas was also my friend even though I only know him for a short period of time. But I saw and witnessed how he made a change in your life and made you happy, man. And it’s unfair how—“ He pinched the bridge of his nose.

Sam’s short speech and feels makes Dean’s eyes stung. Manly tears aborted by finding the zipper of his duffel bag and swallowed the bile. He turned to Sam after he took a deep breath and plastered a weak smile. “I know. Let’s get our asses outta here then before you turned into a woman.”

Sam throw a pillow on his face.

 

 

 

 

The excitement and adrenaline were two reasons Dean survived through 19 hours drive plus some hours of stop over and traffic. He ignored the soreness on his lower back while Sam’s stuck listening to his Led Zeppelin songs. And managed of showing Dean a recent photo of Naomi taken from a casino.

As he saw the photo, flashbacks shot through his head, a pounding sensation inside his skull and made his vision spun they nearly crash on a signage. But as soon as they entered Florida and arrived at Naomi’s office, somehow the pounding pain subsided.

But there’s a familiar tug calling his name from afar like a voice muffled inside a tunnel, a warning. The plush and cream colored painted walls, bare white floor and the strong scent of incense didn’t calm Dean’s mind. Through Sam’s research, they discovered Cas has a mental illness. He was admitted for two and a half years and five months of rehab.

He sat face to face with Naomi who stared at him icily, hands clasped on the table. “He’s diagnosed suffering schizophrenia after the death incident of his family. His father and I did what we had to. He needed help those times.” Her smirk betrayed her fake sad tone. Dean clenched his fist, glared daggers at her. She leaned back, “He met his fiance Meg after he got out of the rehab. He goes back to being a fancy known lawyer. But Meg died in a car accident which Castiel drove that night.”

Upon realizing the information, everything Cas told him clicked.

“It all crashed down on him and swallowed him whole in an instant. Then he took Alfie—“

“No, that’s not..” Dean cut her off as he stood up hastily causing the chair hit the back of his knees and knocked down on the floor with a thud. His heart hammered wildly inside his chest.

“Mr. Winchester all of it was his hallucinations played inside his head. His twisted—“

Dean slammed his fist on the table that made Naomi cringed. “Look, Dr. Novak..” He gritted out with disgust, “I was with him and witnessed every impossible thing happened right in front of my eyes. Hell, it nearly killed—“ His throat tightened upon remembering Cas died in his arms. His lips trembled but he squared his shoulders and puffed out his chest. “Whatever you’re sellin’ shove it back to your ass because I won't buy any of it. He suffered of what you did—“

”We helped him!” Naomi ground out.

“You poisoned him.”

With that, her eyes widened, “How—How dare you accused me of such a thing—“

“You poisoned him slowly in order to take him out of Chuck’s heir list. But you failed on killing him so you made him run away—“

“Enough!” Naomi roared as she stood up hastily. Her face tightened in anger. But then in a flash, she relaxed and stared at him. “I see you’re attached to him so much.”

“Well, I don’t see any reason of not being attached to him.”

She smirked and paced in front of the wide window showing the skyline behind its glass. “You sympathize then.”

Dean huffed and rolled his eyes. She stopped on her table and place her hand on it.

“Mr. Winchester as far as I’m concern you’re also showing symptoms a lot like Castiel’s.”

“Oh, for fuckin’ sake—“

He missed Naomi’s smirk and her finger pressed on a button and the door swung open. Dean turned around but he’s hit hard with a punch and took away his consciousness.

 

 

 

 

Numb.

Dean felt numb all over. His mind was awake but his body’s in a state of coma. Yet, he’s still aware of the tingling sensations inside his chest. How dry his throat felt like he swallowed the Sahara desert. His eyelids heavy and only took a half glimpse of his surroundings.

He heard muffled voices behind him, a loud thud in front of him. Then there’s a figure, a human giant figure crouched down— _Sam!_ _What the hell Sam’s doin’ in here?!-No-no—no!_ He needs to wake up. On his peripheral half open vision, a glimpse of light caught his attention. Orange, crackling and moving fluidly. Fire.

He forced his eyes to move on his left side. There’s a circle of fire and a person stood inside. Trapped . He tried to stay focus to clear his blurry vision while his heart stuttered.

_Cas?._

Cas whipped his head to Dean’s direction, eyes wide in shock and a mix of relief. The corners of his mouth tug as a small smile plastered on his lips. _“Dean..”_

And oh god, how much he miss that voice, how much he wants to move. How much he tried working and forcing his voice out. But he only managed a tiny whisper. Cas is alive?

Maybe Cas heard him as he tried stepping closer to the fire. Pure concern and fear on his face, fist clenched on his sides. _“Dean..”_ He whispered, _“It’s okay. I’m going to save you..just hold on, okay?”_

_How the fuck—Cas is really alive!_ His breath hitched as he felt something wet running down his face. Manly tears of joy. He saw Sam tackled and fought someone he can’t decipher and Cas is—Cas is flicking his wrist. Something shiny and pointed object came out down his sleeves as he glared on the person tackling and punching Sam.

_Dean blinked._

He’s back inside the white room. Naomi’s face hovered above him, flicking that tiny flashlight aimed at his eyes. “What is your greatest fear, Dean?”

Dean tried to lash his hands out but instead, he dosed out. Now he’s running away from a guy chasing him with a machete. The forest becomes narrow as black feathers falling down like rain. He heard a shrieking voice that made him stopped. Lucifer appeared in front of him holding Cas’ neck, aimed the angel blade on his throat.

But as soon as he took a step, the shrieking voice got nearer. Lucifer stabbed Cas’ back. The blade went through his chest, lights poured out from his eyes and mouth. The black feathers pooled on his feet turned into blood. Dean shouted but his voice won’t come out.

He can’t reach Cas, he can’t save him. He fell down in the middle of the sea of crimson blood. He shut his eyes tight. _It hurts..I’m so sorry, Cas._

He felt nothing anymore.

Dean opened his eyes and found himself stood in a rooftop building. The gray sky above him lifeless and dull. Even the chilly wind didn’t felt damped or cold as it hits his skin. As he turned around, Sam stood in front of a closed iron door. His face grim and held an air of authority. The way his shoulders lax from it’s usual broad but stiff, crutches and brace cast leg gone made Dean bothered to the core.

“Hello, Dean. How’re you feelin’?”

And that’s where Dean realized the big wrong of this picture. Sam’s body glowed or Dean’s playful imagination not tired playing tricks on him does interfere. He shrugged, “Peachy because you’re wearing my brother’s face. Who the fuck are you?”

Sam clasped his hand behind, “The other opposite of the three sisters who weave golden threads.”

Dean’s brow furrowed, “Like the red riding hood’s granny or the designer of the world’s expensive purse?”

Sam, or whoever mofo rolled his eyes, “I never expect how dense you are. _Destiny_.” The duh is obvious in his voice.

“Oh, the hair.”

The mofo—Destiny only raised his brow.

“My brother’s girl mane attracted you.”

Destiny chuckled but then sober up with a scowl. “You’re such a child. I don’t even know why an angel of the Lord fell for you.”

Dean sobered up with that and glared daggers to Destiny. “I think this is the moment you spill for the climax. Stop messin’ with my head.”

“I didn’t. I’m fixing it and it took not just centuries on me fixing that noggin’ of yours.”

“Why?”

“The big bearded guy already wrote the grand story and branded it. And oh, you’re wrong. He’s listening every word you said.” Destiny let out a long suffering sigh. “He won’t stop whining and I didn’t even sign up for this. This whole stuff on this alternate reality universe wasn’t mine. You wished for this because you lost one of those ‘someone’ that’s part of you. But sorry, Dean this is real. All of it. This is only one of the millions of reality you’re in and you can’t change it.” And he whispered the last line. “He’ll die in the end.”

Dean looked away and stopped the tears welled in his eyes. “So, all of those shadow effects..” He swallowed the bile or the words Destiny uttered.

“Yes, that’s me. But Cas’ mojo is his own and I can’t outdo it. Lets’ say he remembered a tad of who he is and made him confused and also made the whole play in delay.” Destiny glanced down upon the old pocket clock on his hand. The ticking sound of it echoed like a drip of water inside a cave.

Dean, however, wants to punch the bastard wearing his brother’s face, who plot Cas’ death scene. But before he could even do that and impossibly do any either without flying and end up in a heap with a crushed bones or turned into ash, Destiny snapped his finger.

Flashbacks once again played inside his head.

Finally, the trench coat guy revealed its face. The memories from the moment Cas entered the barn door appeared like in reel movie. The memories played continuously until Cas almost died and uttered those three words Dean don’t deserve. Until those moments Dean reached out for Cas when he attacked Lucifer with an angel blade in hand as Sam dragged him out the portal.

And how relief he had when Cas came out of that tear from an alternate universe. But that relief was taken away in a blink when Lucifer stabbed Cas’ back.  The tip of the blade went through Cas’ heart. His grace light up through his mouth, open in a silent cry. He screamed as Cas fell down, lifeless. Charred coal black broken wings printed beneath him.

_“There’s a curse between you and Castiel.”_

Dean heard the staccato beat of his heart.

_“You always chose each other, fight for each other. But then you always step back away from him because of that fear.”_

Dean’s left arm tingles hot where Cas’ handprint located. “Every time I take him back, things always screwed up and I lost him again. Hurt him every chance I get..”

_“Well, how any times did he came back to you?”_

Dean rememberedCas being Emmanuel and didn’t remember him but in the end, Cas recognized him. He remembered Naomi brainwashed Cas, beat him but he did recognize him. The time Cas suffered in Rowena’s dog’s spell, and lastly when the creepy naphil controlled him. But yeah, he did always comes back to him.

_“But this is just a borrowed time, Dean. You asked for this and so I’ll give you this grand moment. A ticket to win him back. But tell me, how long will you evade that fear? I she going to suffer first and died many times before you tell him?”_

**_‘Don’t hold back.’_ **

Dean opened his eyes and wake up in reality.

 

 

 

 


	5. Chapter 5

 

 

Dean woke up bleary eyed and groggy as the alarm clock on the side table blared to life in its _My heart will go on_ song. Fudgin’ Samantha and his revenge. His body protested when he moved and limbs tired like he’d been on a triathlon the whole week—Wait, has this happened before?

He snapped out of his dramatic protest and stood up hastily beyond wobbly legs, soreness ignored with a few wince on his face. He ran outside his room and headed straight to the study hall, eyes searching for—

Sam’s giant form hunched and making a camp on the table surrounded by books of Lore. He acknowledged him with a nod, “Hey, Dean—“ But he never finished his sentence as Dean hugged in a bone crushing grip, “Whoah, okay..”

Dean pulled away, eyes round with astonishment, body buzzing with excitement that Sam noticed because his brows raised to his hairline. “Where’s he?”

As if on cue, the bunkers’ door groaned and yanked open. Dean can’t  help the swell of his heart and flutter inside his stomach gone nuts, it tickles. There he is, wearing that stupid usual tan overcoat, tousled dark brown hair still in disarray, five o’clock shadow on that chiseled jaw, scrunched up nose, creased brows and deep ocean blue eyes narrowed on the list he was holding.

If this is how it feels to fall then he’ll fall every day with this dorky little guy. And there ya go the sappy confession of Dean Winchester. He didn’t budge on staring Cas and he only heard Sam’s shuffled steps next to him.

“Okay, gotta grab my laptop now, we’ve got a lot of work to do.” And he trudged his long limbs away, leaving Dean and Cas.

Dean’s eyes zeroed in on Cas holding a bouquet of heliotrope and yarrow, the same flowers he gives to Dean on the other alternate reality. Cas is alive and—He stopped in his tracks, eyeing the flowers warily. This is not the last thing happened. Last time he recalled Sam checking on Jack, the naphil son of Lucifer.

_He was kneeled down beside Cas’ dead body. The charred broken wings evident on the ground. And he looked up to the dark sky, waiting for God to bring Cas’ life back like he always did. He prayed even though the big guy is way too absorbed somewhere. But no one’s listening._

_To his left side, a shining vertical glowing orange light appeared._

“Hello, Dean. Uhm, I found these—“ Cas gestured to the flowers, smelling it. “They’re beautiful.” He smiled fondly at Dean. “And it’s amazing how humans give meaning to this—“

Dean closed the distance between them and sealed their lips together. It was just a quick, chaste kiss. Cas’ eyes widened in surprise. “Fuck, Cas I miss you.”

Cas blinked then furrowed his brows and before he can bite back a reply Dean yanked his lapels and kissed him again. This time, Cas tentatively ran his hand at the back of Dean’s neck, pulled him close and deepened the kiss. Dean’s arm wrapped around Cas’ waist and pulled him impossibly closer and Cas melted into his embrace.

Dean opened his mouth when Cas bit his lower lip. Their tongues collided and Dean moaned as Cas explored his mouth with his expert warm tongue. That made his groin twitched to life.

“Dean, have you seen the—oh—OH—“ Sam’s eyes widened, stumbled back, hitting the back of his long legs on the edge of the table and nearly fall his ass.  “That’s—that’s nice you guys—I’m happy for both of you—just take your time I’m—“ And he finally bolted away in a flash like a frightened moose.

They pulled apart with panting breaths, lips were swollen. Cas’ eyes dilated and Dean is on the edge of blowing his load on his jeans. He cupped Cas’ face, thumb ran gentle circles on Cas’ cheeks, traced every line and smothered each with butterfly kisses.

“Dean, I-I miss you, too.” Cas kissed Dean’s cheek and stared at him wide-eyed. “I was there..” He whispered, searching Dean’s eyes.

Dean blinked, “Really? So, that’s still you on that other part crap?”

“Yes.” Cas nodded solemnly. “But every time I’m close of remembering of how I met you..how I died in the same verse fo reality, Destiny will pull me away. But here, now, I’m not afraid to remember everything. Because you and Sam are the only reason of who I am now. You taught me more than an angel would know about humanity, free will, and love..and I..I love you. I always do.”

Dean’s heart and insides melted metaphorically and kissed Cas. He shuddered upon remembering Cas’ death. “You died in my arms and I can’t—just never do that again.”

“I’d do it every chance I get just to keep you safe. And just like I said I want to remember you. Always.”

“So, that means..” Dean licked his lips nervously.

Cas’ sad eyes are enough for Dean to look away. “I’m running out of time.”

Dean looked up and held Cas’ gaze, “This won’t be our last.”

“I know.”

No more filter and denial this time, Dean kissed Cas passionately.

 

 

* * *

 

 

 

 

Lips connected in a hot searing kiss, they stumbled inside Dean’s room. Hands fumbling and nearly tearing each other’s clothes now scattered in a trail on the floor. As soon they’re both naked, they pulled away from each other with panting breaths and lips were swollen.

Dean’s eyes traveled down every inch of Cas’ naked form above him, straddling his thighs. He ran a hand through tanned smooth skin, running feather light touches from Cas’ shoulders gliding down the muscle on his arms. Cas bit his lower lip as Dean’s hand glided down his chest and earned a gasp as he passed Cas’ erect nipples, toned flat stomach, running gentle circles with his thumb on Cas’ sharp hipbones and down to his thick muscled thighs.

Cas shuddered with each touch, breath shallow as he nuzzled the crook of Dean’s neck. He chances a nibble on Dean’s jaw and sucked a mark on his collarbone. Dean moaned when Cas captured and sucked the nub on his nipples. Playing and lapping at it with his tongue.

His hips thrust forward meeting Cas’ hard on until they both thrust to each other rhythmically. Moans and whine (from Dean)and grunts (Cas) echoed inside the room. The delicious friction made Dean’s toes curl but he wants something more. So, before he loses like this, he held Cas’ shoulders.

“Cas, wait.” Dean croaked out breathlessly.

Cas stopped moving above him, concerned eyes searching with worry etched on his face and Dean’s sorry with that. “Did I hurt you?” His hair more tousled and sexed up, flushed pink blossomed on his cheeks, neck, and chest.

Dean kissed him with a smile on his lips. “No, Cas I want to try it.” He bit his lower lip and waggled his brow playfully when Cas furrowed his brows further. “I want to feel you inside me.” He swallowed nervously because this is really going to happen. He wants this to happen, damn it.

Cas’ curious expression slowly faded as realization dawned him. He smiled and Dean’s inside gone wild. “It’s an honor, Dean.”

Dean chuckled lightly and playfully slapped Cas’ ass. “Oh, it is because you’re going to be inside the world’s beautiful hole, Dean’s blue hole.” Cas’ furrowed brow came back on his reference and before he could retort back Dean beat him with a kiss. “And I want you to watch me first.”

Dean reached on the nightstand and fumbled a bottle of lube among cluttered things. Cas sat and watched with hungry eyes, erection stood proudly between his legs with the tip shining beads of precum. Dean licked his lips upon the sight and crouched down between Cas’ legs.

He tried a tentative lick on the tip of Cas’ cock, tasting it which elicited a surprised gasp from Cas, fingers raked on Dean’s hair.

“Dean, I can’t hold it any longer.” Cas sounded like he’s out of breath, eyes blown in lust stared down at Dean like he wants to smite him if he delays more.

Dean reached out and pinched Cas’ flushed cheeks and lasciviously wink as he positioned himself. He no longer freaked out because this is it. He’s here and alive and real. “I know.”

Spreading his legs for Cas’ best view, he slicked his fingers with lube and circled his entrance. He watched Cas’ eyes widened in fascination as he started fingering himself with practiced ease. He’d done this during shower time while jacking off so he expected this will hurt less.

But this is the first time he’ll going to stick a dick, an angel of the Lord’s dick into his ass. He held Cas’ hungry gaze, mouth open in an ‘o’ when his fingers brushed over a bundle of sensitive nerves inside and his legs shivered.

Cas ran a few strokes and held the tip of his cock as he kissed Dean gently. “You’re so beautiful. So, so beautiful.”

Dean can’t even form words on his mouth upon Cas’ whispered words. He pulled out his four slicked fingers and whimpered at the loss. He gently pushed Cas down on his back and straddled his thighs. “Are you ready, gorgeous?”

Cas nodded and he pulled Dean down with a searing open mouthed kiss. Dean held Cas cock, veins thick pulsing, hot and heavy on his hand. He ran a few strokes, coated it with lube, swiped his thumb on the slit. While Cas’ hand traced gentle circles on Dean’s hips as he slowly sank down.

They held their breaths, eyes locked as Dean felt the head of Cas’ cock breached and stretched his rim. A few deep breaths and relaxing, Dean felt Cas’ big, hot girth rubbed along his walls and stretching it. The burn and pleasure made him moan like a porn star.

He felt full and so close to Cas like they’re _becoming one- kinda-cliche._ And Cas’ dark blue orbs screamed different kinds of emotions translating the words that his mouth can’t utter as he bit his lower lip seductively. Dean was impossibly turned on right now and painfully hard as he felt his dick twitched and trapped against their sweat-slicked bodies. This is weird, the good kind of weird.

Until he finally bottomed out. Cas’ fingers dug into the skin on his thighs trying to control himself. Dean took a few steady breaths and circled his hips agonizingly slow. The friction inside him caused an explosion of undeniable pleasure he ever felt in his entire sex life.

He lifted up slowly and sank down finally earning a delicious moan from Cas. He does it again in a steady rhythm, riding Cas’ cock, palms flat braced on his lover’s chest and felt the staccato heartbeat beneath. Cas’ hand grabbed Dean’s ass cheeks and met him up and Dean loses himself when Cas hit that sensitive spot again and again.

Dean panted, “Oh, yeah..Cas, baby I’m so close..”

Cas's arm hooked under his armpit and flipped them. Now Dean’s lying on his back. He writhed beneath Cas as he thrust in a fast steady pace. Skin slapped noisily, the bed creaked and shook.

“C-Cas..” Dean choked a whine as his orgasm hit him hard. Fingers gripped the sheets as his body spasmed, back arched off the bed, legs wrapped tightly around Cas’ waist. His cock pulsed white hot long striped of cum painted his abdomen and chest. Spots of white clouded his vision and heard the rapid beat of his heart.

Cas watched him in awe and braced his legs as he thrust erratically. “Dean..” He bit his lower lip and muffled a whimper.

Dean pulled him down in a messy wet kiss, tongues battling for dominance. “I got you, Cas.” He croaked out thickly, voice hoarse and throat dry.

With a shout of Dean’s name, Cas came. And Dean groaned as he felt the hot semen sprayed inside him, quaking another orgasm from him, walls clenched around Cas’ pulsing cock. Cas whispered his name like a prayer as he keeps coming inside Dean. Until Cas twitched when Dean clenched once more.

Cas collapsed above Dean like a boneless heap of jelly. Wetness squashed between them and ignored as the post-orgasmic bliss lulled them both.

“That’s...awesome..fantastic, best sex I’ve ever had...” Dean slurred and kissed Cas’ temple.

He winced when Cas slowly pulled out and lay beside him. He felt Cas’ cum ran down his thighs. But he ignored it and just lazily smiled as Cas pulled him into a tight embrace, head rested on his chest.

“I love you.”

Those three words are enough for Dean to come down from his post orgasmic bliss. He looked down and met those pair of blues stared at him adoringly. He cupped Cas’ face and kissed him chastely. “I love you, too.”

And God, how those words didn’t sound and tasted foreign on his tongue. On how the gaping hole in his chest finally whole now that Cas is here beside him. How many years he chickened out and denied this. Too many.

But now..

They woke up a few hours later in each other’s arms, limbs tangled beneath the sheets. Dean felt Cas’ morning wood poked right between the cleft of his ass. He wiggled back and chuckled when Cas hissed and grabbed his hips.

“Dean..” Hearing Cas’ rough graveled voice made Deans’ dick twitched and stirred awake.

He turned to Cas and rubbed their erections in slow thrust. “Morning to you too, sunshine.” He kissed Cas lazily until he crawled beneath the sheets.

“Dean, what’re you—“

He heard Cas gasped as he wrapped his lips around Cas’ cock. The precum tasted a little bit salty, a hint of sweet with a musky, heady and something that is Cas scent. Cas’ fingers massaged his scalp and he moaned around a mouthful of Cas’ cock. He lapped at the slit, ran his tongue along the fat vein and sucked down Cas’ heavy warm balls.

 He continued sucking Cas’ cock and hollowed his cheeks. Cas’ loud moans and involuntary thrust made Dean opened his mouth wider. Until the head of Cas’ cock hit the back of his throat. Cas’ hold tightened on his hair, thighs quivered but he pulled Dean away when he gagged and choked.

“Dean, don’t hurt yourself.” Cas said hoarse, panting and debauched.

Dean licked his lips and blinked out the tears formed on the rim of his eyes. His jaw a little bit sore. “Just give this one to me.” He crawled back down and ignored Cas’ protest as he picked up where he left.

He stared at Cas’ gorgeous dick and mumbled, “I gotta give you a nice long head of feels.”

He tried his gag reflex once again and hummed happily when he did it without gagging or choking. So he bobbed his head in a steady rhythm. Cas finally peeled away the sheets and held Dean’s cheek as he shoots his load in a muffled cry as he bit his lips. He shuddered as Dean keeps on sucking, swallowed every bit of his load.

Cas twitched and pulled Dean in a messy kiss, tasting himself. He wrapped his hand around Dean’s shaft and stroked it in a fast steady pace. Swallowing Dean’s moan as he rubbed the tip with his thumb. Dean thrust to Cas’ hand erratically until white hot spurted out his cock.

He bit Cas’ shoulder as his orgasm and Cas’ talented hands milked him ‘til the last drop. And his jaw dropped when Cas tentatively licked his fingers splattered with cum.

“Wow, you’re a kinky little bitch.”

Shower sex was not that really safe at all. He nearly falls his ass off but ended up cumming and shooting his load on the tile wall, twice as Cas’ erratic thrust never wavered hitting his prostate and come inside him. And yeah, Cas definitely had a cum kink for he spread Dean’s ass cheek and lapped at Dean’s puckered rim where his cum leaked out.

He poked and swirled his tongue inside and Dean moans tiredly, voice a hoarse whisper as he felt the roughness of Cas’ skillful tongue scraped deliciously on the sensitive walls inside him. They padded to the kitchen grinning each other while Sam greeted them with a leer.

And eyed suspiciously on Cas’ neck where a hickey the size of Texas visible and screaming it’s Dean’s fault. Sam looked down at the newspaper with grimace mixed with horror. And the result is like he’s constipated.

Cas wore one of Dean’s AC/DC gray t-shirt and dark blue tattered jeans that hugged his thick thighs and ass perfectly. (According to Dean’s POV.)

“God morning, Sam.” Cas sat across Sam as Dean nursed them cups of coffee. Cursing the coffee maker as it almost slipped his grasp.

Sam replied eyes still reading the newspaper, “Morning, Cas.”

Dean slapped Sam’s arm, “Good morning, bitch.” He blushed upon the word as he sat beside Cas and served his coffee.

Luckily, Sam didn’t notice as he just glared daggers at Dean. “Morning to you too, jerk and next time ditched me nicely.” And he narrowed his eyes dangerously at Dean who only shrugged.

And the much more oblivious Cas accepted the coffee solemnly from Dean. “Thank you, Dean.”

Sam finally found a hunt and thanked the heavens above. “Oh, I found us a case to—“

Heh, the heavens heard the wrong prayer Sam sent as Dean and Cas now sucked each other’s face.

Sam sighed in defeat but smirked, “I will never gonna used to this.” He stood up, laptop clutched on his chest. “I’ll give you five minutes—“

“Twenty!—“ And Dean had the decency to bid while ravishing Cas’ neck as the Angel moaned and straddled his lap.

And helpfully Cas butt-in, eyes full of determination and something—“Make it thirty, I want to try something I saw on the internet lately.” And fudge, Dean grinned lasciviously as Cas continued undressing him and nearly tearing his clothes off.

“No!—Ugh! You guys—like what’s the use of the empty rooms—“ Sam can only grimace and looked up to the high ceiling helplessly as Dean and Cas throwing their clothes on the floor and rutted each other. “Ugh! Okay, that’s it. I’m out.”

“Gotta savor the borrowed time of mine!” Dean managed to yell at Sam’s retreating back in between Cas’ teeth nibbled on his left nipple and hands under his pants.

Sam ran as fast as he can, “Whatever! Just canceled your honeymoon phase for—okay, fine. I think I need a spell for sound proofing the walls of my room. And maybe hibernate for a day..” He heard Dean moaned and he covered his ears. “Years?” Followed by Cas’ whimper, crying Dan’s name.

Sam turned up the volume on his stereo. “Forever.”

 

* * *

 

 

 

 Days turned into weeks. Weeks turned into months and months turned into years with some of Sam’s scarred for life and baggy eyes moments included. Dean embraced the domestic life he chose. Woke up every day next to Cas by his side and most of the time watched him sleep. He does the cleaning, laundry and cooking stuff while moose and the adorkable angel do the mess.

Dean and Cas fulfilled the 100 dates in different places. Watching the aurora borealis on the Northern coast of Siberia. Spent one week exploring Dean’s blue hole in bay west Clarence town on Long Island, Bahamas. And sometimes Dean’s hole included with Sam horrified and traumatized. But most of the time they spent cuddling on the hood of the Impala under the dusted starlit dark sky.

Sam urged Dean to buy Cas something special. And Dean’s sappy side choose a promise ring engraved with their promise words and the day they first met. It’s not the kind of the fancy ring with huge diamond stones, glitters, and shit. It’s just a plain, simple silver band.

In this alternate reality, Lucifer still locked in the cage. No Nephilim in the oven, Mary stay dead and the BMOL’s not in their noses up yet. Cas’ mojo was quite intact and his sassiness leveled up. Thanks to Sam. They’re in the middle of ganking a nest of vamps somewhere in the corners of Ohio when Dean fudging proposed to Cas.

And of course, Cas finished their hunt, unleashed his mojo using his _’shut your eyes’_ voice. The vamps turned into heaps of ashes on the ground. Cas accepted Dean’s proposal and freakily scooped Dean up in his arms, kissed him breathlessly. Sam laughed at Dean who flailed and yelped in Cas’ arms as they fell on the muddy ground.

Dean cursed and fell atop Cas and they started the intense eyes sex. Sam captured the gross moment on his phone. He silently ran through the busted door before the sickeningly sweet gagging moments begins. Dean looked at Cas, the angel he admittedly loved.

He doesn’t care if he’s going to be trapped, traveling through different kinds of an alternate reality. To hell, heaven, purgatory and millions of alternate universe and back, and even death, he’ll reach that end of the line to meet Cas. Because every reality he only got a borrowed time and every bit and moments with Cas matters.

He can change every end with this.

“I will find and take you back.”

“I’ll see you again then.” Cas smiled and tapped Dean’s nose three times.

“I love you, too.” And he won’t get tired of telling Cas those words.

The clock alarmed as the surroundings turned a swirling static. Another portal is open. He kissed Cas one last time. “9.18.8. You’re the one who gripped me tight and raised me from perdition. I love you..you dorky, sunshine, sassy, nerdy angel. I love you, Cas and It’ll never change.” Dean twirled the ring on Cas’ finger and kissed his knuckles.

Cas put a note in Dean’s pocket and kissed Dean back as the orange light got brighter and swallowed them both, never letting go of each other’s hand.

 

So the continuation might be: They woke up in another alternate reality and never knew each other. But somehow the note and the promise ring they wore will bring them back together. Actually no, it ended up just as close to that as their profound bond the one’s at fault again...Sam included.

 

 

 

 

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> I would like to thank my Beta and friends: Rachell Gamboa and Natnat Nonetheless.  
> My sponsors: Myself, Old model PC, dim lights, the kiddie chair...


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